when it’s watered.”
I don’t know why I’m making this post so difficult because all I really want to say is this: Be intimate with your husband more often.
It will transform your marriage.
I could go on and on about this…and maybe that’s why I’m hesitating. I don’t want to overstep the boundaries of this Catholic blog or offend the discretion of my readers, though I do want to reiterate what I said in Part I of this series: We will never have the closeness we want without giving our husbands the closeness they need.
I know that there are exceptions to this rule. I know there are wives who are sick or postpartum; I know there are husbands who aren’t at all interested; (those particular comments from Part I made me so sad); and I know there are couples who have to abstain for various reasons. This post isn’t for you, okay?
This post is for wives who don’t think that they’re interested.
This post is for wives who don’t think that it matters.
Can I be honest? (I know you want me to.) It does matter! It really, really, really does…though it’s taken me a good 15 years to get it. I’m going to lay it on the line and just say it: Once or twice a month is not enough…and once a week isn’t enough, either.
Perhaps you have baggage that you brought to your marriage. I did and I’ll tell you, it mucks up our bedroom! In giving myself to my husband with love, I have had to distance myself mentally from a couple of things: one, all the mistakes of my past life; and two, the world’s corruption of God’s plan for sex.
(Read: pornography and all that crap.)
There’s so much more to sex than this! If it weren’t meant to be beautiful—that is, if being beautiful wasn’t God’s plan for it—than it wouldn’t be pleasurable for both the man and the woman, and it wouldn’t be God’s way of bringing new life into the world.
In other words, you gotta think God thinks it’s good.
It’s just the world and the devil that have messed it up.
And so—and so—with all that said, I would like to do another giveaway. I have one more copy of Style, Sex, and Substance
to give to one lucky winner. All you need to do is go out on a limb…and tell us one inspiration—or, conversely, one impediment—that you have or have had in the bedroom. That way we can get ideas and/or offer advice where needed.
I’ll go first. ☺
My advice is for all you co-sleepers who wonder how thrice-weekly relations are possible. Are you ready? Here it comes: An afghan on the floor is your ally! The sleeping angel in your bed will be none the wiser…but oh, how much richer your marriage will be.
And that’s it! I’m hitting “publish” before I lose my nerve.
Oh, and I’ll leave the comments open until next Wednesday morning…and will choose one
lucky brave winner that afternoon.