Or, Things My Almost-Three-Year-Old Teaches Me
(You can read Part I here.)
Now, none of this made sense to me. I knew this mother to be an efficient & capable & loving mom and yet, she wasn’t doing what I thought she should do. I tried to wrap my brain around this—I tried, but was really struggling. And then the little guy approached his mom and whispered something in her ear. “I can’t change you,” she told him gently. “I’m sorry.”
At that point I thought I understood. “Um…is this a potty-training thing?”
“Oh no,” she laughed. “I just forgot to bring a diaper!” And that was the real reason—she simply did not have the means to change him. She had rushed out the door, run out of diapers, whatever. I had been in her shoes a hundred times.
“Oh!” I thought, and then, “Oh!” I said. “I have a diaper! Would you like it?”
She said yes.
Well, had you guessed her reason for not changing that diaper? I’ll bet you did because you are better than me! I can be fairly slow on the uptake, you know.
Anyway, I wanted to tell this story for a couple of reasons. One is that I wanted to remember George’s remark, “I not ‘tinky. He ‘tinky.” The other reason—the bigger reason—concerns my heart…and how quick I am to judge other people.
This is a ‘tinky admission but it’s true.
I wish it were as easy to change this bad habit as it is to change a messy diaper. It is a hard adjustment because in my mind, I’m usually thinking I am right. Being “right” means the other person is “wrong,” and my mind—and heart—stay closed closed closed.
“I p’ay p’iest, Momma?”
I should like to be little like a child.
I should like to be good at letting other people change me.
(Ahem. Change my heart, is what I mean.)
(But you got that, right?)
Judgment of others, how true eh!
Um, that last picture,,,the first thought that came to my mind is that u can use that picture when you make up the invitations for his ordination mass/reception in about 25 years!!!!
Good story, and a good lesson for all of us to learn from this story. I think it is something we are all guilty of doing from time to time, and need to be reminded not to assume in situations. To always wait to you know all the facts before making a "judgement" Thanks. Ann
I find more often than not that I am quick to judge. Quick to suspect and wonder. Quick to think myself above the other person who clearly is wrong. It's a steady work in progress and I realize how often I do it when I'm trying to amend the problem. yikes.
Too cute, George! Thanks for the smile this morning.
I so get this. I have a lot of luggage and expect people to love me just the way I am. However, why is it so hard for me to love others and their "luggage". Great post. I totally get this and struggle with it myself.
I am not so judgemental to others, in general, as I am with my own family!!
Great story and great lesson. Love the "tinky" part.
No, I did not guess that outcome . Perhaps I judged her too. But I think it's human nature to try to solve a mystery, to find reasons for behaviours, to "judge" other people. Did you really think she was a bad mother? Or did you just think she was doing a strange and wrong thing in that instance? And look at your gracious response once you learned the truth. You didn't think, "what a bad mother for forgetting diapers." You offered up one of your own – and those things cost money.
I appreciate I am judging you here – judging you to be a good person. 🙂 I think it's inevitable. I try to tell myself that what goes on in my foolish brain sometimes, my brain which has been programmed by this messed up world, is separate from the love God patiently grows in my heart.
Also – could your little boy be any more adorable? 🙂
Ah, I can relate too too well. Thanks for sharing your story. It's a good reminder.
If I guessed, it is only because I have been "that" mom! And I have been offered diapers or wipers in the most unlikely places (like, where there is no one around who has a child anywhere near diaper-age). What have I learned? Always be on alert to pay it forward.
Oh, you sweet girl. 🙂 We must wear the same size shoes!!!! 🙂 Your sweet boy . . . I can hear his voice when you type it in "his words". So darling! My oldest turned 18 last Saturday and all that came to mind my was that he used to call McDonald's french fries "neat naws". They do grow up so fast! Aloha, darling!
I'm right there with you. I try, but fail mightily. I did not guess. I couldn't imagine why she wouldn't.