I need a fun diversion.
In yesterday’s post, I mentioned my wanting to try an epidural this time around. Will she or won’t she? I don’t know. There is a part of me that’s very “old school”, very “grin and bear it.”
Strike that last phrase in quotations.
Change the word “grin” to “grunt.”
It’s an offer-it-up mentality, I think. It’s a fear of the unknown. (There’s a needle, right? And it’s near—gulp—my spine?)
It’s…
I just don’t know.
I’m going to ask my doctor what she thinks tomorrow.
Today, though, I’ll ask you.
What has been your experience going pain-free on the delivery table? Share your tale if you dare.
AMDG,
I love epidurals…I have had five of them. While I admire those who go without and wish I could do without, it’s just something I am resigned to do. What can I say…I’m a wuss. I have never had any problems with them. Praying for you and your family!
God Bless,
Nicole
I had epidurals with my first two…but then started to read things about the benefits of natural birth for both Baby and Mother. I had my 3rd all natural. It was hard but an awesome empowering experience. Everytime I look at my daughter I am glad that I was able to do that for her. I plan on going natural with this 4th baby too. Have you seen the “Business of being born”? Oh, please watch it. You can google the trailer on you tube.
With my first four children, I had epidurals. Though they were great (pain free), I felt like I was missing out on something. For my last two deliveries, I went natural. I must say it was the most awesome, spiritual experience that I have gone through. Yes, it was painful but I would get my sacrifice intention in my head before each labor and offer my pains up for that person. My first intention was for my grandparent’s souls. My last intention was for my sister to return to the faith. I am now expecting my seventh baby and I’m already thinking of whom my sacrifice intention will be for. There is always a long list of pour souls that need prayers. I am not a person that is absolutely against epidurals. I know if this labor would go long and I felt helpless, I would think of getting an epidural. I will say that the recovery time with an epidural is much slower than going natural. After delivering natural, I got up and went to the bathroom right away. It sure beat being catheterized! Have you thought about a waterbirth, Margaret? I hear that they make labor faster and the idea of soaking in a warm tub while laboring, is so appealing to me. I’m thinking of trying it this next time.
First baby I was in hard labor for like 10 hours or something like that, before they decided to do a c-section.
the next 3 and now 4th are c-sections where I throw up the entire time and have a ton to offer up. If I could have the c-section without the puking and the long recovery, I’d go for it.
basically I’m saying go for it, you’ve done them without, now go for it with, who cares? You’ll still have plenty to offer up, I’m sure of it.
I’m going with Have One! My first three I did not have one, just because I left it up to the doctor, on number 4 my friend told me I needed to insist on one. I did – what a difference! I was laughing and joking during the delivery and because I had already had 3 others I was not afraid to not know how to push. It was great. With number 5 my contractions were really strong – I think they turned up the pitocin too high, so the epidural didn’t help very much at the end, but it did make pushing and the actual delivery painless. It lets you be more of a part of it instead of overwhelmed by the pain.
You asked about “pain-free on the delivery table.” Now, I’ve had two med-free births but neither on the delivery table. I think that would make a huge difference for me.
I had one of those med-free births at a birth center and one at my home. I was in control of my environment, which makes a huge difference.
If I was at a hospital again (in which I’ve had two epidural births) and someone was dictating to me that I should stay in the bed or I couldn’t walk around or something similar than I don’t know if I’d have the ability to go med-free. I kind of need quiet and no talking and arms-length support to go med-free. Those aren’t really popular aspects of a hospital birth, KWIM?
Like on of the other commenters, I felt with my first two medicated births that I missed out on something.
It has also been much easier for
me to heal after the non-medicated births. Good luck with your decision making!
Presently, I have 4 kids and have had no epidurals. Each birth of my kids was a once in a life time experience. I just didn’t want to miss anything. Yes, it’s painful..but it’s a good kind of pain. Temporary with a great gift at the end. It’s also a great time to offer up some suffering.
Honestly, with my 4th baby I had assumed that I would be open to an epidural. My husband just laughed at the thought. “You won’t”, he said, “you like feeling them at the moment of birth too much”. And he is right.
My prayers are still with you. If decide to try w/o the epidural may I make a suggestion? I don’t personally know you so I don’t know how you handle pain but, no sane person likes pain so here is my 2 cents:
what really helps me is to have my husband guide me through the pain. All he does is tell me where my condractions are on the monitor. I just need to know how close I am to it’s peak. I also “visualize” the baby. The opening of my cervix, and he/she coming through. I try to find a peaceful mental place and truthfully at that point I KNOW THAT GOD HAS TAKEN OVER.
Good luck and GOD BLESS!!
Elizabeth
CA
I TRIED to get an epidural a time or two-or three-but the cards were stacked against me. The first two times, the German midwives said the timing was all off, and the third, an emergency c-section next door monopolized the anesthesiologist. I stopped trying to get one. 🙂 I don’t mind, really. There’s something intensely powerful about working through the pain. In a sudden rush, it’s over, and there before me is my newborn child. I don’t think I’d really want all that dulled or destroyed by drugs.
Well aren’t you opening up a big can of worms? I hated the epidural. I was numb all over and couldn’t push, my daughter’s heart rate dropped and they had to use forceps to get her out quickly which led to… well, we’ll just say *a lot* more pain in the long run than a few moments discomfort I experienced with a natural childbirth. The dr. also had trouble finding the right spot and I ended up with a very sore, bruised back from all the attempts at getting that needle in.
If you want to ban me from commenting, I understand. 🙂
I’ve gone natural each time with mine and I’ve been grateful that I have. I tried something called Nubain with my first (which was the most minimal med. I could be given), but it made me feel worse and didn’t help with the pain a bit. My second was much faster (8 hrs. vs. 24 hrs.with my first)labor. I took nothing with him. For me, I try to stay up and mobile for as long as I can. That helped me progress a lot better. I still get very sick and feel like vomitting during my entire labor (thankfully, I don’t), but I always go into it thinking that it may be my chance to work off my purgatory time. I stay focused on each contraction, rather than dwelling on the length of time past or how much longer it might last.
My nephew’s wife just had a baby this winter and she tried a shot ‘down there’ and it helped her relax a bit more and although she still felt some pain, she also had the chance to rest too in between. Not sure of the name of it.
Either way, whatever you do, rest assured of an abundance of prayers that we’re all sending!!
Oh Margaret – I was hoping to open up MinnesotaMom today and find an announcement of a new arrival. Soon, very soon.
I delivered my first without any medication and I felt like it was an AMAZING experience, but let’s be honest, I only had a 4 hour labor so there wasn’t much to complain about.
Ultimately it is your decision. I will pray that you make the right decision for yourself.
I’m praying like crazy, can’t wait to see the announcement.
I had every intention of going natural, but I've had to be induced early all four times due to pregnancy induced hypertension. The Pitocin they used kicked the contractions into overdrive & there was no break in between, so I went w/ the epidural. Each time was different, but definitely a lot less pain. I had a great anethesiologist each time.
The only thing I didn't like was that my legs felt like an elephant's legs as it was wearing off. As for after effects – the spot on my back was a bit sore (like a muscular ache) for a day or so.
My three births were med-free, but also at home. Dawn alluded to this above — being in control of your environment probably makes a BIG difference. Not to mention that, when one is at home, one knows that meds are not an option. I think this makes a big difference psychologically. Also, some of the crap they put you through in hospitals increases pain and discomfort.
I had pain and discomfort during all three deliveries, I sometimes wanted it to stop, but I never desired pain meds (because I wanted to stay home more, I guess!) So, having been at home, I suspect my experience doesn’t translate well to the hospital.
I guess that if I was in a hospital I’d be more likely to choose meds, and I’d expect to if I was going to be induced for some reason. The unnatural contractions induced by artificial hormones like pitocin are not the ones our bodies were designed to be able to ride.
(by the way, I would not write about the “offer-it-up mentality” as if it is something bad. I admire very much women who choose to avoid pain medications during delivery for the express purpose of offering the pain up for some cause. I believe this kind of prayer is very efficacious! And very well suited for intentions for friends with difficult pregnancies or infertility; for women faced with crisis pregnancies; and for one’s own family.)
I had a c-section first time, so I certainly had an epidural for that one. I didn’t even consider going without one the next time. For me, the epidural was great, and allowed me to truly experience my daughter’s birth. I know that’s opposite what some other people said, but that’s how it is for me. The pain during initial labor (well, up to being dialated 9 cm, so not so initial, I guess) took all my focus and I couldn’t even think about her, only about the pain. Once most of the pain was gone, I was able to just think about my daughter. It was a very good experience, in my opinion. I’m not sure what people mean by feeling ‘medicated’ (and I’m not being critical or contrary, I mean truly that I’m not sure what they mean by that), because it didn’t affect me mentally at all – it just took most of the pain away so I could focus on the birth. I didn’t feel drugged or anything like that. I will say that the epidural I had during my c-section was more like someone described where I coulnd’t move my legs, etc., which was unpleasant, but I also think it was necessary. Please do what is best for you and your own situation. All of us are different. God bless you! I hope it’s soon!
I am all drug free. We have had five and been through being induced, a “get her here now!” emergency, and an 11 pounder. No drugs is better for baby and better for mommy.
But whatever you decide, good luck!
Have I told you ladies that I just love you? Truly, your honesty is so appreciated and for that reason, Jenn, I would never ban you from commenting. Far from it!
The funny thing about the “offer-it-up” mentality, Erin, is that while I have always been “good” about offering up my natural births, I am rarely good about offering up the unforeseen, unchosen sacrifices of each day. So I think there should be some balance there…at least in my own life.
I would second Amy’s suggestion to watch “The Business of Being Born.” Birth is a topic so close to my heart. Epidurals can be a blessing… I witnessed a friend give birth and her epidural was pure blessing. Certain situations warrant them. That being said, our bodies are amazingly designed to give birth! BTW, if someone told me to give birth on my back (delivery TABLE?), I might have to hurt them!
My first four were in hospitals, my last two at home. The last two were easiest. During the intense part, I tell myself over and over, “This is good, this is getting my baby out,” I pray and concentrate on relaxing. For me, labor is working to let go of fear so that I can release, trust and welcome that miracle with lots of happy birth hormones! I’ll stop now. Blessings!
No pain, no pain. The only pain I had was before the epidural. After the epidural was blissfully pain free and relaxing. My labor never progressed until after the epidural — contrary to all those stories. My body relaxed and baby came. I hold on tight to those babies — they all come late (except Peach) and labors are long (until after the epidural). I know all girls don’t have good epidural experiences, but the anesthesiologist was always my favorite face to see (after my newborn’s of course).
I meant to add that I have never had trouble recovering from delivery with an epidural. I got up and went to the bathroom immediately afterward. Maybe that was really good anesthesiologists (at a university hosp) maybe just my body, but I was up and walking around, showering, holding and nursing baby. The only thing that was numb was from belly to bottom during labor.
In the vein of “not fighting the contractions, but working with them”, I had very good pain relief with a nurse gently swaying my hips from side to side as I stood leaning against a counter. Maybe that’s something like the belly-dancing thing I’ve heard some ladies speak of. Also, when I was too tired to stand any longer, the “birth ball” (just a big exercise ball) was supportive and let me keep up a similar movement while sort of squatting or kneeling. I was amazed at the difference between this and being “on the table”! Pushing before I knew it. Wishing you a wonderful, peaceful delivery.
I had 3 natural and my last baby was with an epidural. LOVED it.
I have had an epidural each time and plan to have one again this time around. Not sure about those who say you can’t feel the birth process…I felt everything, including being able to push, just without the pain! I will take pressure (what you feel if the epi is done properly) over pain any day. And I recovered quickly each time, including my 9+ pound boy whose arm was stuck up near his head (I shudder to think what that would have felt like without the epi!)
Funny thing… Nicole mentioned in the first comment that she is ‘a wuss’ for not wanting to go without an epidural. I think I’m a wuss because I’m petrified of getting an epidural.
With Princess I had one little pain shot. No epidural for me and I’m ‘planning’ (we all know that you can’t plan for labor and delivery) on the same for when I give birth this summer.
Princess had dropped enough to pinch some scar tissue in my lower abdomen and I was in some really ugly pain that slowed down my labor. Couldn’t relax between contractions. When the nurse mentioned an epidural my fear of having someone put a needle into my spine kicked into full gear. My blood pressure fell a little and I’m pretty sure the look on my face did more than my words to convey my thoughts of “Please! Is there anything else we can try before going THERE?!”
In less than an hour after that pain shot I was pushing.
I had epidurals with my 2 children. The first was at a hospital I didn’t trust and the epidural was not done well. I felt everything and it was pointless. Because of this I tried going natural the 2nd time, but around 7 cm couldn’t take it and begged to try the epidural (my doctor knew the reason for my hesitance to get one in the first place). This was at a different hospital that I trusted completely. And let me tell you, I absolutely fell in love with that epidural the second time around. When my baby was born, I could hardly believe I had even had a baby compared to what I went through the first time. I will probably get an epidural everytime from now on, but not early in labor. I will probably always wait it out as long as I can. I’m worried getting it too soon would slow or stall my labors.
No epidural for me. I was in a car accident long ago & had compression fractures … I don't want a needle anywhere near my spine. The unknown of the needle is much harder for me to bear and the pain of labor has not surpassed the pain after the accident.
That being said, my first labor was very long (went into labor late Sunday night & he was born Tuesday around 7p) so I did receive Stadol in the afternoon the day he was born. I hadn't slept and this allowed me to rest a bit, even with contractions.
The other three have been without any medication and that's what I plan this time, too. I wouldn't call my labors short or painless, but I'd rather deal with it naturally. I know most times what to expect (back labor with three, but each time I've learned a new technique to lessen the pain). With my last I was able to labor in water – that REALLY helps.
I always have good intentions of offering up the pain of labor, but I'm not sure I'm very successful. It takes a lot of my thought process to concentrate on relaxation. I'm very much in my 'own little world' during delivery.
Regardless of your decision, Margaret. I hope you have a happy birth & can't wait to see the announcement!
I had epidurals with my three so far and I was fine. I appreciated being able to focus on the birth of my baby than the pain I just couldn’t handle. But I can respect and appreciate those that choose to go natural, pain free.
Oh, I LOVE the war stories! When I hear them I amazed that people exist at all anymore 😉
Let’s see, with my four I’ve done a little bit of everything I think.
I’ve had one fab epidural, one blah epidural, and an epidural that didn’t work, hence an impromptu natural birth.
The truth about epidurals is that they are very subject to a “user error” of sorts.
First of all, a good anesthesiologist is critical to epidural performance. If the catheter is too much on one side or another, you won’t get good pain management, and IMO it’s worse to have an epidural that doesn’t work than no epidural at all. At least with no epidural you are not waiting in vain for pain relief that never comes!
Secondly, if you’ve ever had an epidural before, then you have a little scar tissue in your back already. If the dr. hits that scar tissue on a subsequent epidural, then you get no relief because the scar tissue blocks it. (that’s what happened to me during one of mine)
All that being said, with the one epidural that worked out properly, it was GREAT. I was not drugged up and immobile. I could move my legs and feel when to push w/ no problem. I felt all the pressure but none of the pain so I knew when to give it all I had and when to hold back a little. I was not numb for hours afterward — I was comfy and alert, using the bathroom, etc.
I’ve never had any ill-effects from epidurals, even the ones that didn’t work well during labor. No headaches, backaches, etc.
Oh, and from one of the comments above that mentioned the “shot down there” – that’s called a pudendal block. It is not meant to make a laboring woman pain free, but it can used when a woman is in hard, fast labor to “take the edge off,” as they like to say.
It doesn’t last for a long time, but most women are on the verge of birth when it’s given anyway.
Good luck making your decision, Margaret! Can’t wait to hear the good news 🙂
Hi Margaret,
Good luck in whichever route you choose. Of my five births, I only took Nubain during #5. The last three I was on pictocin and for #5 he wasn’t in the right position (felt like back labor). My #2 was two weeks late and was 10.5 lbs., but labor seemed easier with her than when I was on pictocin for the other three. (Yes, #1 was a darling and came early and weighed less than 8 lbs., but she had the cord wrapped around her neck twice so she had to be “assisted” out.) My Mom had 6 babies all without the epidural and did fine too (so maybe it’s a genetic thing, although my sister had an epidural with all three of hers.)
If we are blessed with another, I’d still go without the epidural (I figure with my luck, if I chose to go WITH one I’d be the statistic)
I totally planned on not using the epidural. I researched alternative drugs that weren’t as strong as the epidural and didn’t require a needle in my back. I was doing GREAT until they broke my water. 45 minutes later I was in pain and the doctor came in and asked if I was ready for my epidural and I quickly said yes and he said he already had it prepped for me. I didn’t even have time to “think” no, I just did it.
I wish I would have gone painfree! But the epidural sure did rock.
Can I tell you how much I love epidurals? 🙂 I love, love, love, love them!
3 deliveries, 3 epidurals. The first 2 I had the epidural placed after laboring for a while. I went from feeling like I was splitting in half to utter bliss! 🙂 The 3rd, the epidural was placed even before the pain started! (Wow, was that nice!)
Each time went very well for me. When they place it, they numb the area a bit first. When it goes in, it feels like a pinching feeling and then a funny ‘springy’ feeling. I wouldn’t say it hurt. There was NO comparison. The pain of labor was 100,000 times worse than the pain of the epidural going in!
Then with each delivery I went to sleep. I took a nap and they had to wake me up for internal checks and to push. I say ‘nap’ because once the epidural is in for me, my labors go quite fast. My body relaxes and everything goes quickly. I had no problems pushing with the epidural. I felt alert, comfortable and could talk with my husband and doctor. We were joking and laughing! The main sensation I felt was pressure. It is a funny feeling but not unpleasant.
That’s my 2 cents!
I highly prefer epidurals or inerthecal morphine (sp?).
1st c-section.
2nd labor from XXXX lasted for over 10 hours with the pitocin all the way up because my water had broken and labor hadn’t started before I was dilated to a 3. I started bawling. That labor went another 10 hours with all kinds of pain meds – I won’t do narcotics again. I was begging for another c-section and then wouldn’t do it but then at the very end the doc said 10 more minutes and it will be a c-section. Then I bawled for days thinking we could never have another child because I couldn’t do that again!
3-5 were awesome with pain meds. I felt like I could enjoy my baby afterwards and I am afraid of the pain.
6th dd came too fast. NEVER AGAIN! My doc even apologized to me, though she added there was nothing she could do differently.
So, when 7 came along, rather than send me home from the hosp. dilated to a 4 when labor stopped (which oddly enough has happened to me more than once)- she broke my water and gave me pain meds so I didn’t have to risk going it with nothing again. I am eternally greatful! I really respect women for choosing not to use pain meds. But, personally, I need it and I really don’t see anything wrong with it!
From someone having done it boths ways, I personally prefer the meds.
Praying for a safe and healthy delivery for you in whatever you choose.
never done pain free…so I’m not much help. 😀 sorry.
Praying for a safe and healthy delivery though. Blessings to you, Margaret!
I went 36 hours through induced labour without pain reflief (I asked for it but they wouldn’t give it because I was still in the ward at that point – my labour was intense but not progressing – not the delivery room). By the end I was so exhausted, I had to have a c-section. Yeah, lousy hospital. But wait, there’s more. I stated clearly, no students working on me. But a student anaethetist inserted my epidural for the c-section. And she got it wrong. I felt the needle go into bone. She damaged one of my disks and I was in pain for years, couldn’t carry my baby, etc.
So do get an epidural if you want one (I wish I’d been allowed one through labour, it might have saved me from a c-section) but make sure they don’t let some idiot student do it!!
If you skip the epidural, do try a warm bath. It helped me. Of course, first make sure the hospital staff have *cleaned* the bath after the last person, or else you will find yourself soaking in someone else’s dirt and dead skin, and that is not so relaxing. Did I mention, lousy hospital? 😉
With #1 I had Stadol early on, which is a short-acting IV med. It was totally out of both mine AND Baby’s systems WAY before birth… actually, before transition. FOr the actual pushing the midwife used massage and Lidocaine on the perineum which was a God-send.
#2 was a little complicated with my uterus not cooperating, and after 3 hours at 8 cm (yup, stuck in transition) and all the alternative natural methods the midwife and I could think of, I finally agreed to an epidural. For that instance it was totally worth it, as my uterus needed that time to recoup in order to do what it was supposed to be! It took a little longer to really move around and feel steady, which I did not like, but I had stopped coping with labor and am grateful for the Big Needle!
I am not sure I will choose an epidural for #3, as I thought it very rewarding the first time around. However at least it showed me how beneficial that can be and it removed my inhibitions!
I’m definitely praying for you!
Our little one was 8 weeks early and I went med-free. I hadn’t really considered an epidural and forgot about it mostly. Even though she was only 4 pounds 4 oz. she was face up which meant I pushed for an hour to turn her and then another hour and a half of pushing to get that little tiny baby out! Crazy. I apologized to my nurses after she was born (and in the NICU) for being such a whiner. I thought that I would be tougher, but it was pretty painful of course. They reminded me that I was med-free and I was like “oh yea!, then I take that apology back!”. I had great nurses! I guess I don’t know what I would do next time (God willing there is a next time!), but since I did it once all natural then I am pretty sure I am tough enough to try it again, even if I whine a bit.
God blessings to you Margaret … do what is best for you.
Okay – thought I’d add…
#1 I had intrathecal morpheine, which I needed because Nate was sunny side up. My water had started to leak and as soon as the DR broke my water, the pain was INTOLERABLE. Literally, I was rethinking the name Nate and considering Tom, the anesthesiologist’s name… The relief was that good. So, pushing time comes and Nate’s cord prolapses with him and he starts to crash, so I have to push him out FAST. It took 7 good pushes and he was out AFTER a 3rd degree episiotomy. The down side to the intrathecal morphiene is that in 10 percent of the women who get them, the genital tissues become hypersensitive. I went into shock because the pain for the 32 stitches, regardless of the lidocaine shots they gave me, was unbearable, even compared to the back labor.
Needless to say, I’ve avoided meds for the other 4. Julia was 10lb 10oz, no med. The rest were below 9lbs. Ambrose’s labor was augmented with pitocin (turned all the way up to 11) without meds. Now, that being said, I don’t experience transition…I go from 7 to 10 in about 1 minute, so there you go…that’s my experience.
I have had the most wonderful births because of the epidural. I was able to have quick pain free deliveries and when my kids watch their birth videos, they see a happy excited mom. I totally endorse the experience to be happy and not something to fear. Shouldn’t you be all smiles and happy when you open very special “gifts”?
Darlene Sundheim
OK I haven’t had kids. But I HAVE had an epidural…I received one right before my transplant. My mom was freaked about it because she had epidurals for my other two siblings and they were done wrong. But mine was really easy and the pain control was fantastic.
again, I haven’t had kids, but I don’t have any traumatic memories of it. 🙂
Okay, Margaret, I’m holding out for Saturday for d-day!
I’ve had 4 kids, 3 births, and no epidurals. 1st labor was fast – 4 hours(active part anyway, latent part was days) and I only pushed for 15 min. I got lucky.
2nd labor was the twins and I did not have painful contractions until they broke my water at 9cm! I had to deliver in the operating room “just in case” and oddly enough, despite my legs being in stirrups, and lying on a table skinnier than me, that was the best I was able to relax with any of my labors. It was a super intense, super fast time of pain. Like going from 0 to 100 in 60 seconds!
3rd labor I was 10 days overdue and being induced by breaking my water. That got things rolling and I had another 4 hour labor. But the last hour or two was THE MOST excruciating pain ever. LONG 3 minute contractions. No break. Then when the baby came out, his shoulders got stuck (shoulder dystocia) and they had to do some manuevers that made me wish I had gotten an epidural!
I always tried to offer it up as well and I’m glad I was able to do it, but after that last one, I don’t know. If I get to have another baby, I might have to go for the epidural, esp. if he is a boy and late!
May God grant you a quick, easy, and safe delivery. Soon!
Love, Janet
3 All Natural births here. 2 Csections. Wouldn’t trade those natural births for the world.
I know exactly what you mean about feeling like your age somehow justifies dispensing with the “offer it up” mentality on this one. I had 5 natural births, and then, when I was 35, my husband really pushed me to have an epidural for the 6th. His reasoning was that, hey, we’ve done all that, and yes, it was a beautiful, spiritual kind of pain, but nowadays we’re just trying to get through each day with a lot going on, and he’d just as soon not have to offer up the fingernail marks in his arm this time. Well, I gave in and hated the epidural. I missed the adrenaline rush and the feeling of having withstood something so powerfully painful. Unlike him, I was still feeling young. I decided I’d never do that again.
Then three years later, with baby number 7, I changed my mind at the last minute. I felt like I was just lucky to be having another baby, and that I needed to just get it done and get her born and in my arms. The no-nonsense attitude it takes to run a big family suddenly crept into my birthing experience. But it was still a beautiful experience. It was the easiest birth I ever had. Truly, it was just no big deal. (Except for the part where they put the catheter in. A needle in my back freaks me out, too.) I am so glad I did it. The recovery time was just as quick as a natural birth, and I felt truly present in the moment, just in a different way. Would I do it again? I think yes, because if I have another baby I will be older still, and probably just as busy and preoccupied. There’s always plenty to offer up postpartum! 🙂 And, it was nice to have my husband more relaxed so that he could be more supportive. I never really grasped how much it stressed him out to see me in so much pain, and to have to feel in some way responsible for somehow alleviating it.
Just don’t do it if you are pushed into it, or truly aren’t ok with it. I think that is the factor that made all the difference for me. Like my husband said, either way, this is really all about the baby, not the birth, and you will soon have him/her in your arms! 🙂 Good luck, Margaret. I will be praying for you, too.
Jumping into the conversation (and it’s a good one) to share my husband’s remarks.
Here is what he had to say:
“I tend to think this is a choice I best leave to you. I think you know what you need the best, and I see both choices as acceptable medically.
“I’m not terribly worried about what I might miss, I just want a baby and a wife.”
I love my husband. He makes me grin.
Hi Margaret,
your hubby is too sweet! You are opening a can of worms here–and I loved everyones comments.
Just a reminder from your friendly childbirth educator over here– (and I don’t mean to be a “Debbie Downer in any way!!)
Epidurals have the possibility of slowing labor, (and making it hard for the mother to get into advantageous birth positions) thus the possibility of the use of pitocin, leading the possibility of stressing the baby, hence the possibility of a C Section or instrument delivery.
Usually an epidural can be a great relief, but it’s not without the possibility of unforeseen consequences.
Our Lady is with you in these exciting days!
Well…as the 45th comment, I’m sure that you have gathered some good information already! However, I thought I’d go ahead and comment as birthing issues are very close to my heart.
I had a (unnecessary) c-section with my first baby. I was one of those moms that was duped into the whole cycle of induction-“failure to progress”-it’s dinnertime-operating table. I was 21 and didn’t know better. I have had to be a fighter since then, bucking rules, regulations, and requirements and it has rewarded me with 2 successful VBACs. Both times, however, my OBs insisted on epidurals for safety. I have to say, I am thankful I had one at the very least for the first VBAC delivery. They gave me a mirror and I was able to see, and not feel the misery of, my baby being born the way she was meant to! That was such a wonderful blessing to my wounded heart, I can’t even begin to tell you! That being said, this time I am delivering with midwives who say I don’t have to have an epidural and I’m going to shoot for that. I feel that the lower the number of interventions, the lower my chances for a repeat c/s.
I am praying for you as you prepare for this next little one!
I had a water birth with the 3rd. Much better than just laying around on a table. Helps ease the pain and make contractions easier to manage actually. Knowing myself I wouldn’t like it one bit if I chose an epidural. I’d feel like I was cheating but that’s me. Much more scared of the needle than the pain.
You’ll probably want to have an idea of what you’ll do, but be open to changing your mind while you’re there in the hospital if the medical situation changes. I had a relatively quick birth with both of mine and the second was superfast. They’d been threatening pitocin induction due to a health situation with me, and I’d been resisting b/c I knew from the 1st birth’s afterbirth pitocin dosage I couldn’t handle pitocin pain w/o a ton of painkiller or an epidural 🙂 One doc was really great about an alternative to going with pitocin induction with epidural- he stripped my membranes in the office one day and the next afternoon I did the heating pad/hot shower/nipple stimulation at certain intervals (I would caution anyone that this is powerful and you would want consult your doc/midwife). Resulted in quick labor later that evening and a healthy baby well before midnight. They didn’t break water until I was pushing so the pain was as manageable as it could be. I’m praying that you have a healthy delivery and that you feel comfortable with whatever you decide. Truly, you have a wise and wonderful husband. I know you must be so excited to hold and kiss this long awaited miracle.
My first and my fifth babies, I had an epidural. Couldn’t get one for the other three. Yes, it is scary getting a needle near your spine. You can’t move. Meaning you’re not allowed to move. Hold on to your nurse if you get afraid. I did.
Having said that…I would absolutely opt for one. That last delivery was such a breeze it didn’t seem fair. LOL. I looked at my doctor and said, “you’re kidding. I’m delivering now? I can do this. I can push.” It was like….whoopee!!! No pain!!! Gift from God.
Yep. I’d do it again.
I've had three natural childbirth experiences and I wouldn't have it any other way. There's definitely an "offer it up" component that appeals to me (I wrote about "offering it up" during most recent Palm Sunday labor here: http://www.katewicker.com/2009/04/mary-elizabeths-birth-story.html), and I certainly do find birth to be a spiritual experience. I know that sounds cheesy, but it's true. We're taught as Christians that suffering has a purpose. To me, nothing brings that message home like labor.
However, I've chosen natural childbirth for other reasons, too. My pushing stage is extremely short, which I know is partly just due to the way my body works and me just being lucky. But my midwife has also said that being in shape AND going natural make it much easier for women to not only push but also to know WHEN to push. This can speed up the whole process.
It's also incredibly empowering as other women have said to give birth au natural.
Then there's the fact that having a more hands-off labor is actually safer. I'm all for medical interventions when necessary (my husband is actually a doctor), but I think we can go way overboard in L&D and that many of the interventions can lead to more interventions, including unnecessary C-sections. The entire ethos of our culture is that if the technology exists, then we should use it. With my first birth – even though I was under the care of midwives – I was almost made to feel like I was a noncompliant patient because I was opposed to certain interventions. Women shouldn't feel like they're not being good moms if they turn down some of the technology available to them (like frequent monitoring). We should also be allowed to trust our bodies. I remember that some of my contractions were not being picked up by the monitor with my first labor.
"You're not having a contraction," the nurse told me as she watched me deeply breathe. Like %$# I wasn't. I knew what a contraction felt like at that point; I don't care what "technology" was saying.
Likewise, when a woman does choose to attempt natural childbirth, she often has to be adamant about walking around and perhaps even breaking certain hospital protocol. I was admitted with my third at 7 cm and told the nurses I didn't want to be monitored. They were not initially supportive of this rebel rouser laboring woman. When my midwife arrived, she supported me. The nurses ended up being supportive, too, when they saw how quickly my labor went after they allowed me to keep walking.
I just feel that birth (nature!) shouldn't be feared and that technology shouldn't always be trusted as the way to bring life into the world.
In addition, I always feel great after giving birth. Tired, yes, but I definitely experience a sort of mania once my baby's in my arms.
Finally, I've been fortunate to have all three babies latch on right away and nurse like pros. Some of this is probably luck, but I do think part of it has to do with the fact that there are no drugs coursing through either one of our bodies.
Now, all this said, what I believe every woman deserves is a happy birth experience. If a woman's idea of a beautiful birth experience includes an epidural, then, by all means, she should have the right to choose to have that.
I just wish more women were informed about the different options available and understood that women who choose natural childbirth aren't superhumans who cannot feel pain. Nor are they hippies or martyrs who couldn't sign up to get a stigmata so they settled for childbirth sans meds instead.
My goodness, I've prattled on for way too long.
Whatever you decide (or whatever ends up being decided for you; after all, there are many things we're unable to control in the trenches of L&D and thank God for modern medicine during those times!!!), Margaret, I pray your baby's birth day is a beautiful, memorable experience.
God bless you!
I’ve had three epidurals and three not (interesting to note that all the boys required epidurals). I do NOT prefer epidurals. The recovery time is much longer (for me) after an epidural, and my ankles and legs are swollen with retained water for more than a week after the birth.
With the last baby, they gave me so much that I could not tell it was time to push. Thank goodness I knew how, or I don’t know how he would have come out.
But I can see how you might want to be pain-free. It’s not a moral dilemma. Wait and see, Margaret.
I had epidurals with my first three…then all natural in a free standing birthing center with our fourth child…but like one post said, I started reading about natural birth…and I honestly can say I wish I would have done it all natural the first 3 times. It was raw, real, spiritual, empowering, and emotional all at the same time..as soon as it was over I said “I’m doing this again”…and sure enough, we are expecting our 5th baby in August and are planning a homebirth this time.
Margaret, I triple dog dare you to print out all our comments and take them to your doctor tomorrow.
I had an epidural the first time around as I was exhausted and not progressing… 45 minutes later I had gone from 4 cm to 10 and was ready to start pushing. My body needed to relax and I was just not in control and able to do myself.
Second baby was born at a birth center and I was really worried about how I would handle the pain, but I was able to keep my mental and physical strength and make it to 7 cm and a warm tub, which relaxed me so much that I was rushing back to the bed to have a baby five minutes later. I really couldn’t believe how fast it went and how much better it was than my first birth, despite the fact that I had no drugs.
Really, you need to just do what you think is best and what your body and doctor are telling you is best. If you don’t have the pain of labor to offer up, then you’ll have more to pray for during those late night feedings!
Blessings to you!
Margaret:
You know…childbirth is an awesome thing. And there’s no one “right way.”
I’ve given birth nine times, the first four completely natural, non-medicated births.
The experience of natural childbirth: beautiful.
The next two births I opted for standard epidurals, was relatively pain-free and numb for a couple hours post-partum.
Those births? Beautiful.
The last three births were medically necessary inductions and which left me paralyzed from the chest down for three to four days each time (post-partum), a week’s stay in the hospital with a morphine drip for the pain and had to use a walker for several weeks. I have DSP (diastasis symphysis pubis…look it up, it’s not pretty!) My perception of the birth of my last three children?
Beautiful.
Beautiful because BIRTH IS BEAUTIFUL! All births…natural, epidural, caesarean, forceps, vacuum extraction…if medically necessary and efficacious for a safe delivery, each means a blessing.
How could the birth of a one’s very own child be anything but beautiful? I’ve often joked that by the time I’m ready to deliver I don’t think I would’ve cared if they’d pulled the baby out of my ear! I’ve heard too many mom’s express sadness, regret or disappointment when comparing birth stories, many finding yet another way in which they just don’t measure up.
There’s no yardstick here…your body knows exactly what to do when it’s time to do it. And hospitals/doctors/medication are not the enemy…fear is! Whatever choice you and your dear husband make to bring this baby to your arms, safe and sound, it will be the right one. May God bless you, dear Margaret. So many of us are praying for the day, hoping to hear the blessed news that your little one is here and you safely delivered…
You are in my prayers!
I had a dream of natural childbirth with my son. I was able to do it sans meds until 8-9 cm. Unfortunately that was also the point when the resident doctor found out my son was breech. I was too far along to try to flip him around and had to go in for a c-section instead. I didn’t notice any labor pains until I knew I was getting surgery meds – and it made me lose my mental focus.
I wish I could have gone natural all the way, but I am glad I only had drugs during the last 15 minutes. My baby came out very alert and unmedicated. I didn’t fare so well. The meds took away the pain (which was pretty intense by the time I arrived in surgery), but I hated the whole c-section process and the long recovery afterward.
My vote is still for natural birth. I am going to try for an unmedicated VBAC next time around. My only advice to you is to hold on to your mental/spiritual focus, whichever route you take. My prayers are with you!
An epidural is your friend.
I agree with sentiments like what Kimberly just expressed: whatever you choose is what is good and right for you.
A friend of mine just recently had a scheduled c-section. I visited her at the hospital and I was all “Let me get this straight, you weren’t even IN labor, you got some drugs, and then you got a baby?”
She teased me and said something like “Yeah, Ms-I’m-at-home-in-the-bathtub-and-in-HURTS!”
Anyway, her experience really reinforced for me the many different types of labor you can have.
I want to say I had all three of mine via c-section all natural, no meds, but that would be so lying!!! Do what you need and what is best for you. God bless!
8 babies, 3 epidurals (#1, #2, #8)
After #3 I had intended on never having an epidural again except for a surgical birth. When I was in labor this last time I changed my mind.
It wasn’t particularly painful. A normal labor pattern for an induced multip. I was just mentally not ready to go for an unmedicated birth. I was tired, wmotionally and physically. It had been an awful pregnancy, I hadn’t been able to get my doula lined up in time, I was being induced much earlier than expected… I apologized over and over and over as I felt like I had let down..someone, I don’t know who. I just didn’t have it in me that night to do it alone. Dh is a wonderful husband but lousy labor support. My nurse was lovely, had a homebirth herself and my doctor is phenom and a great OB but doesn’t exactly labor sit.
I loved my unmedicated births. I’ve had dreamy unmedicated peaceful births with midwives in darkened rooms and no interventions. That is definitely my ideal but sometimes that just isn’t what happens sometimes.
My advice: prepare for your ideal but be easy on yourself if that isn’t what happens when it gets down to it.
I’ve had four spinals given due to all the kids being born c-sections.
We all came out fine. 🙂
I’ve had two epidurals and one “please-hurry-and-get-the-epidural-oh-no-here-comes-the-baby” natural birth. The natural one was AMAZING and do you know the best part? The recovery! Getting to walk around and use the restroom right away was incredible! Not to mention, I felt the endorphin rush of accomplishing something so monumental.
This in comparison to epidural #2, where the anesthesiologist walked into the room yawning, dropped a kit on the floor, broke another, and then proceeded to ask, “Is your back crooked?” It was horrible… then wonderful, of course.
Resist it if you can, Margaret!! Our Bradley Method instructor told us that not only do the drugs pass through the placenta INTO YOUR BABY (!), the effects of drugs in the baby are evident especially in the first few days (super lethargic, can have dulled suckling reflex & difficulty establishing nursing) but also in that babe for up to 6 months. Holy cow!
Not to mention your recovery will just be that much better not waiting for all of the drugs to leave your system. Dr. Mary is an AMAZING labor coach, as you certainly know. She will help you through it!!
You can do it, Margaret!!!!
I know you have lots of responses and I haven’t read them all, but I wanted to offer up one thing I noticed in the birthing of my three. My first was med free, hence the second one being delivered with an epidural. With the epidural, I noticed I couldn’t feel any reason to push. The pushing phase lasted over 4 hours because I just didn’t know when to do it, would do it at the wrong time, etc. With my first and third, both natural, pushing only lasted about an hour. Who’s to say my second wouldn’t have been 4 hours anyway? I don’t know. Best of luck on your decision. You and your pending arrival are in my prayers.
Nikki
I had an epidural with my first and loved it. I took a nap, which since it was about 3’o’clock in the morning I desperately needed. They did turn it down a bit so I would know when to push and that lasted about an hour. The second was an emergency C-section so don’t have any natural un-aided delivery stories to compare.
Interesting and so varied, all these comments!
Kimberly, I really appreciated your comments, as I’m 7 months pregnant with my 4th and just lay awake last night for well over an hour thinking about this upcoming delivery, as I’ve never yet had the “birth experience” I always imagined or hoped for…and right now am scheduled for a c/s (I live in FL, but not in a major city with a university hospital staff–not a lot of choice here once you’ve had a previous one–even though I had a VBAC in between) and I’m really having trouble letting go of that!
But back to Margaret’s question: my first birth was emergency c/s with general anesthesia so I missed the whole thing. Fairly quick recovery, maybe that’s b/c I was young 🙂 (11 yrs. ago)
My 2nd, the VBAC, I was required to have the epidural (in case of a rupture)when I went in (my water broke at home) and I was so nervous about keeping the labor going (b/c I knew the epidural would likely slow it down) that I stayed awake from midnight to 7 watching the monitors (but blissfully not feeling anything)and then pushing (with no feeling, and no experience at doing it before) for over 2 hours. Ended up with an episiotomy (maybe b/c she was 9 lbs, 3 oz) and found that recovery harder than the c/s!
My 3rd was a “required” c/s b/c again….policy and lawsuits and all that. I get so bent out of shape when I think about it, but, it is what it is. That scheduled c/s was the worst–I almost threw up when they were just doing the IV and prep; of course the delivery was still beautiful and I cried, but the recovery….ugh. Hard. And b/c of all the fluids they give you beforehand, I was actually bigger and more swollen for a week after having my baby than before. So.
My younger sister has had 4, all v-births. First 3 natural, last one with epidural. she loved it and said she wouldn’t do it any other way again.
I figure now that you’ve had 5 already, your body will know exactly what to do, epidural or not–so if you want one, go for it. Idealistically I’m all for the natural, med-free birth…but obviously that’s not in the cards for this mom.
Although I confess to hoping that this baby will come early (before the scheduled date) and FAST so that they can’t whip me into the O/R for the c/s (they told me I’d pretty much need the baby to be crowning)…..but I confess that I’m terribly scared of that as well–b/c I’ve never done it before!!–and if that does happen, it will be an unmedicated.
I’m sure whatever you choose, it is going to be fine, and beautiful. Waiting very excitedly for your announcement!!
I have had 5 children without epidurals or pain med of any kind. Our last baby though was a totally new experience. I had never experienced this kind of pain(I couldn’t pray coherently, it’s was just desperate gasping “Jesus help me”) and they gave me all sorts of pain meds (we had plenty of time before delivery) but I did not progress. I was stuck at 5 cm. Then I received an epidural. It was lovely after all the pain. I fully went to 10 cm and delivered 20 minutes after. I am pregnant again and just want the option of an epidural if things go that way again. God bless.
No epidural do not like the “possible” damage Long long labors (did have one short one back labor all day painting the dining room and real labor 6 hours) fantastic husband coach and great encouraging doctors for 3 out of 4 deliveries and 3 different doctors. Very quick recovery, always an episiotomy; walked as long as I could for last two births — don’t really know if helped move things along. Every delivery is different! You’ve been there and done that — you can do anything.
OH, brother… I’m tossing the same thing around in my head, but I have to say that I’m chickening out of an epidural. All my labors have been unmedicated, each one successively shorter in duration, but OFF THE CHARTS painful. The last one was particularly excruciating – I actually believe that I had post traumatic stress disorder after it! I’m a pretty tough girl, but the memory of my last labor makes my heart race right now. It was a normal, vaginal delivery (not posterior or any weird presentation), hardly any tear, managed beautifully. What can I say? I actually wished I would die in the middle of it, just to stop the pain. Stoic, reserved me screamed like a banshee until I was horse. So many speak of birth as a spiritual experience… it was only like hell for me until I got a hold of my baby. I couldn’t hold a single intention in my mind, other than the devout wish to jump out the window.
So, sensible to seek an epidural, right? Pessimist that I am I simply googled “epidural complications.” I read about them and I get so scared that I’ll permanently injure myself and be unable to care for my other children, or be in permanent pain. I have got three months to decide. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Hubby, who is a manly man and loves the big, tough girl in me does not want me to have any drugs, just like before… “old school,” he says.
So I’m stuck between fear and fear right now. I am SO not much help, sorry. But it does feel good to post my troubles, thank you!
Could you let us know what you do?
Very old woman here responding;probably archaic, but no medicine, 4 wonderful births, but now that I am old I probably do not remember, but I have sat with two of my daughters in delivery and swear by epiderals..or maybe they just do not make woman today the way they use to. 🙂 But I was glad not to see my babies suffer, and I hear they are very safe. I also worried about the needle near my spine, but it was a non issue as in the old days you had to sign the papers before delivery, sounds to me like a man made that one up.
I just want to say that that last comment is from my mother-in-law and she is NOT a “very old woman!” 😉
Of three deliveries I had only one epidural and I would not want to do it again.
My first baby came too fast to get the epidural. I had signed the consent form and everything, but ended up not getting it. My second baby was stillborn. Because of the method of labor induction and the uncertain progress I would be making, the doctors strongly advised me to get an epidural. I did, and it did make labor pain free after I got it. That is, until I started to deliver a bulging bag. Suddenly my body over-rode the epidural or something because I was in the most unbelievable pain I have ever experienced–worse than regular labor. After some minutes the nurses were able to locate the attending OB to break my water and then I delivered. I suffered additional physical pain for weeks afterward. I had to take percoset to sleep through the back itch and pain I felt for almost two months.
With my third labor, I declined the epidural for financial reasons. We did not have insurance, so I couldn’t pay the extra for the epidural. However, as painful as labor was, it was over pretty quickly. Delivery was uncomplicated and I didn’t have to take so much as a Tylenol afterwards.
i had such a bad reaction to the epidural, I really would not do it again unless it were en emergency.
Oh, and on the subject of offering it up, I tried that in my last labor. At first, in early stages, I was able to think enough to offer up specific intentions. Then as labor progressed I had more vague ones, like this is for my family. Then, towards the end, I just offered up “for the intentions of anyone who needs it.” So someone can name and claim those if they like.
When I was in 21-hour labor with my first, I was amazed at how little “myself” I felt before the epidural. Once that blessed needle went in, I was “me” again. I could think, I could talk, I could reason, I could make decisions. I was in control, I was no longer helpless. If I had had to go all that time without it (I had it the last 6 hours), I’m pretty sure I would not have had any more children.
With my third child I did not have an epidural. The pushing went faster because it felt better to push harder. So in three pushes he was out. With my other 3 that I had an epidural, it took longer to push. Also, I was more wide awake and able to get up and walk around right away. (I felt the endorphins more without the epidural) If for my next child I go into labor naturally (without pitocin) then I will not take an epidural.
God bless,
Peggy
6 babies later: I love epidurals! They make birth such a joyful experience. I am much less exhausted and more able to enjoy the baby and the birth process.
It’s not pain free, there is still plenty to offer up (I go in with a list of intentions), but I am way more rested and recover faster.
Interestingly, one of the labor and delivery nurses who attended my last birth was pregnant. She was seeing a dozen deliveries a day. I asked what she was doing. Without hesitation she said, “Epidural!”
Just my experience.
I have had two epidurals out of three births. The first birth was induced due to low amniotic fluid and labor was really intense, no break between contractions, then suddenly I went from 5-10 centimeters in 20 minutes, the nurses tried to get me not to push (haha!) and then delivered my daughter without the doctor. It was a really tough delivery and I have to say I had no energy left, and no emotional energy either to really enjoy my new baby.
With the next two my doctor convinced me that the quick labor was me, not the pitocin, and I was induced with an epidural before the induction. This was SO MUCH BETTER, I was able to slow down pushing and not have tearing and enjoy the birth of my children, stress free. And, both times I went from 5-10 centimeters in 20 minutes.
I too found that the epidural allowed me the chance to “experience” my child’s birth.
Here is my experience will try to be concise: 1st no epidural but had stadol in IV made me loopy feeling (didn’t like) but did give me much needed relief. 2nd-epidural at 9cm while in transition (definitely would not recommend-pls get it earlier if possible if you can imagine being bent over and still while going through a transition conctraction.) Loved that I was so alert after holding baby (so was baby) I did regret the epidural later after my lower back was sore from insertion site for 3 months. 3rd-completely natural but quick. 4th???? Time will tell. Best wishes!!
Can you stand one more? I had an epidural with my first and it made things worse rather than better. Honestly, (as you already know) every birth is different as is every doctor. So one person might have great luck with epidurals and one might hate it.
I found with my next two that staying calm, using Hypnobabies and focusing on letting my body do its own work helped me to have much better births.
You’ll know at the time what is right for you. God will give you all the graces you need to make whatever decision is best for you and your family.
Blessings to you!
I have had two natural and one epidural. The first delivery was overseen by a midwife with hospital privileges and we never even discussed pain management. It wasn’t something I even really thought about since I had no idea what it would feel like. The baby came in three hours from start of labor to the end. It didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would so with the second baby I decided to go natural. I changed my mind during labor and asked for one but then this baby came even faster (an hour and a half) and I never even saw the anesthesiologist. Then, the third baby– my doctor decided I should get it in the early stages so I had the epidural at 3cm, before I was even in any pain. So I felt nothing, which was nice. I didn’t feel cheated, I have been through natural already. Even though I didn’t mind the pain being gone, I really didn’t like that I couldn’t feel my lower half of my body. I didn’t even have to push because when the nurse checked me the baby was already on her way out! I didn’t feel a thing. It took five hours for the epidural to wear off. I had a quicker recovery time (my husband remarked how great I looked the next day) But that being said, if I were to ever have another baby (which is unlikely at my age, 44) I would have it naturally. I had such quick and easy labors, I am really fortunate that I had three healthy textbook pregnancies and deliveries. My husband is a nurse anesthetist, if you have technical questions, or any other questions, he really wouldn’t mind if you sent him an email: sandman132@comcast.net
Three babies here and three epidurals – first epi…not so good, 2nd one…a bit better, and the third was wonderful!!
With each one I did go natural…from my mailbox to the hospital labor room…For the second one the anesthesiologist came into my labor room joking and laughing…THE NERVE…with me lying there in pain! I told him to stop laughing and put that needle in place and then we would all laugh…and he did! 🙂 Many prayers for you and your sweet baby, Margaret!
I am not a very athletic person and I don’t push myself physically very often (okay never). Natural childbirth was my “Mount Everest” so to speak. My first three babies were delivered via natural child birth. (It seems only fair to point out my longest labor was just 6 hours). With my fourth son I had a case of “curiousity caught the cat”. I wondered what it was like to kick back and relax during a delivery. I was already 8 cm when I arrived at the hospital and rec’d an epidural. The end result was perfect but something was missing from the labor journey. It almost felt like it took my husband out of the equation. During previous births I really needed him and we worked as a team. My recovery was also harder. My back (along with everything else south of the border) was very sore. With my fifth baby I went back to natural child birth. In the end all that matters is a healthy baby and a healthy mommy. I will cover you and your beloved baby with prayer!!
Blessing, Kelly
My first was natural, second and third with an epidural administered at transition, and 4th was natural. It’s a toss up. There are pros and cons to both. I usually go in trying for a natural birth and then see where the labor takes me. No two have been the same. Good luck!
Ok, I've never been over here before but stopped by because of Jenn. I'll just throw in my 2 cents even though I haven't read all the other comments.
I've never had an epidural. A narcotic w/ #1 because she was sunny-side up and the pain wouldn't stop. The others were all natural, some at home, even. But the last 2 (5 & 6) involved some pitocin. With #5, they honored my request to keep it to the bare minimum and I did fine. With the last one, the nurse kept cranking it up without any reference to how I was doing and it was the most horrible experience of my life.
Soooo, I think all natural is the safest way to go, but I wouldn't dream of criticizing anyone for having an epidural when pitocin is involved! If there's no pitocin, it's still hard to deliver naturally when the people around you don't know how to support natural childbirth and they don't understand why you would want to go through all that pain.
Good luck with your decision. I hope it all goes well.
Well, I don’t know if you still want more stories, but here goes… (Oh, and you missed your baby having my birthday!) I have 2 children and 2 diametrically opposed births.
With my first, I was in labor at 37 weeks. I wanted to try going without meds, but wasn’t “hardcore” about it. I was beta-strep positive though, so I had to be on IV and ended up with back labor and in bed in the hospital. The baby’s heart rate dropped sometimes, so I ended up with an internal monitor too. They gave me a shot of Stadol and I didn’t like that — it made me feel “loopy” and queasy. After a while, my doc suggested I get an epidural to try to help me relax and help the baby drop. I didn’t have any trouble getting the epidural. They did warn me that I’d feel a tingle down my leg and I did. The epidural did help with the pain and I got to 9 cm. Then the baby’s heart rate dropped and didn’t rise fast enough, so I suddenly needed an emergency C-section. Since I had an epidural in place, I didn’t need general anesthesia. So I was awake and only felt pressure. It turned out that the cord almost prolapsed, so every time I contracted, it squeezed the cord, lowered his heart rate, and kept him from entering the birth canal properly. He was watched in the NICU but was fine. It was a slow recovery for me though. I was sick and had a hard time feeling “normal.” The baby was also sleepy and hard to wake for feeding. Being a new mom I didn’t know how much I had to wake him until a nurse explained. I had to rub his feet and undo his clothing to get him to nurse. But he was more alert after 24 hours.
Birth #2 was completely different. Luckily my doctor and her partner (who was covering) were fine with my doing a VBAC. I went into labor at 37 weeks again and spent a fair amount of time walking the halls of the hospital, hanging on my husband as needed. I also took long showers in my room later in delivery. They helped a LOT. I think I was in there for an hour at one point! I took it one contraction at a time and kept going. Toward the end, the nurse got a shot of Stadol ready for me, but I knew I didn’t want it. In the end, I did it all natural and I’m glad I did. I was so much more aware and in tune with my body. I didn’t have actual recovery afterward and dd and I were both more alert and awake. I loved those early moments and she was much easier to nurse.
If I were blessed again, I’d try to go natural based on my own experience. It is empowering to know you can do it. But I do like knowing that meds are available if I need them!
Take it as it goes, Margaret. You do what feels right to you and is safe for you and your beloved baby!
I can’t wait to hear news…
I’ve given birth three times and never have had an epidural. I won’t say that the actual labor part was “fun” but I find that it is just a few hours of tremendous discomfort…and worth it all in the end. While many epidurals are fine and hassle free they do *somewhat* increase the risk of further complications with the labor…slowing it down, slowing the heartrate of the baby, and a greater increase of c-section. That’s not to scare you. But to point out that because of those reasons I have chosen not to go that route. I figure I can endure anything for a few hours and afterwards I feel like a million bucks. I can get up and walk to my room and take a shower alone.
I’ve had two epidurals and I’m planning to do it again this time. I find them helpful. I’m not terribly sentimental about things like pregnancy and the birthing part of birth so I never felt like I was missing anything. It’s more the means to a beautiful and amazing end to me.
Both girls were fine and I was able to sleep a bit while in labour with baby #1 which was nice. If they can’t do it for some reason, that will be OK too.
Whichever method you choose you have my best wishes and prayers for a safe and easy delivery!
I’ve had two natural births with not so much as an IV. I think epidurals can be useful in certain situations — e.g., mom’s been laboring for 48 hours and really needs some rest, or is just not handling the pain well, etc. — but by and large I think it’s best to go without one, if you can.
There are risks and side effects that can be unpleasant or even deadly (my mom’s neighbor contracted spinal meningitis from her epidural site and nearly died, and there are spinal headaches and such). Sometimes they can even stall labor.
But it all depends on how labor’s treating you. I hope your labor is so quick and easy that you won’t even have time to think about it! 🙂
I should mention that both of my births were in a hospital setting, but I was lucky both times to have nurses very supportive of natural childbirth.
Also, something I found helpful in “offering it up” during contractions was to say the Divine Mercy prayer as I was breathing through them. [Inhaling] “For the sake of his sorrowful passion…” [Exhaling] “Have mercy on us and on the whole world.”
I’ve had 7 childbirths – 6 unmedicated with 4 of those at home. As an “old lady” in my 40’s, I developed complications with my 7th pregnancy – hypertension. I had to have a hospital birth where I could be monitored because of the bp. I couldn’t walk around to get labor really going, so…pitocin. But the pitocin contractions were not good for my bp, so I had to have an epidural to cut the stress. I could relax and rest with epidural, but towards the end the numbness wore off on ONE side. Another dose to numb me again, but just enough so I could still feel the urge to push. I did not have any after birth pains, but instead had this wierd feeling that my insides were going to drop out. My son also ended up in NICU for three days due to low body temp. I don’t know if this was a side effect of the meds. He was healthy in every way, but they kept him for tests just to be sure because of the initial low body temp. It was a miserable three days since this hospital did not have accomdations for NICU parents (so I got my offering up time in anyway). So while my childbirth was pain-free, I would not do an epidural again unless it was an absolute medical necessity. And believe me, I am the biggest baby when it comes to pain. You know what to expect without an epidural – it’s going to hurt, but with an epidural there are a lot of variables.
Hi!
Well, you don’t tell us what you chose.
But I’ll put in my more than 2 cents worth here anyway.
I have 9 kids. First one, C section for premature ruptured membranes, failed induction. Premature meant before labor started, not that the baby was. He weighed 9 1/2 lbs, but the X ray said I would have been able to deliver him, had they been able to get labor started. I had a spinal for that. It was before the days that epidurals were common. I had no adverse effect from the spinal and was glad to be awake. If I had had to have another section, I was going to have a mirror set up and watch the operation.
But the rest of mine came out the normal way. For the second I had a paracervical block for the last part of labor…which I think messed up my urge to push, and a pudental block for the forceps rotation delivery.
The third, who weighed 11 pounds, I pushed out myself, and I had no medication. But I was angry at the doctor who took me up to the delivery room at the last minute, when I had been promised that if I could push the baby out myself I could deliver in the labor bed. Someone came in and offered me an epidural during that labor and I said “I don’t want anything unless I need it.” I didn’t need it.
to be continued
The other six were all born at home with out any medication.
I think being at home makes it easier not to use medication. It isn’t available, it isn’t a possibility, you don’t even think about it. You just think of ways of dealing with the labor. You can walk all you want, shower if you want, get in the tub if you want, you can be stark naked if you want. You can go outside and walk in your yard. For the earlier parts you can do distracting stuff during labor, which make the time concentrating on being in labor much shorter. My husband and I measured and cut curtains during one early labor. I picked and canned green beans during my last labor, although my husband had to finish up the last batch.
I definitely had pain during my labors. With number 5 I had pretty bad pain and bit my husband as a pain reaction, not because I was mad at him. But I think that is because that midwife was so into perineal massage that she made me stay in bed. I like to walk right up to the moment when the baby is ready to emerge, and I think lying down makes the pain much worse.
For my last baby I didn’t get in bed at all, walked or sat in a rocker, and delivered in the supported squat position. I sat on the edge of the bed and leaned back for the one vaginal exam I had, which I requested that the midwife do, because when I had gone upstairs to go to the bathroom, I felt the bag of waters bulging. That is as close as I got to being in bed.
For me being able to move around and be under my own control was worth far more than any pain relief could have been. I now genuinely think of birth as a family event which has little to do with anything medical. For numbers 6, 7, and 8, while I did have prenatal care and a doctor to call if I needed advice, only my husband and I and sometimes some children, were there. For the last I had moved and didn’t have my wonderful doctor to support me and was also far out in the country not near a hospital, and I was lucky to get a certified nurse midwife to come. But I was so used to laboring without anyone outside the family there that my labor stopped when she arrived! She took her assistant and went to buy some juice or something, and when she came back labor was well established. I am sure the baby would have been born an hour sooner without the interruption.
Having her there, though, made the supported squat position, which was so comfortable possible, because while someone does the support someone else has to catch.
I wish for other women that they would have the great gift of knowing that their bodies can give birth without medical interventions of any sort.
A few can’t, and we are glad there are ways to help those who can’t, but they are way fewer than we tend to think these days.
I say no to epidurals and yes to natural, unassisted, unmedicated, uninterfered with, birth.
Susan Peterson