When I asked my husband what he wanted for Father’s Day, he went into full curmudgeon mode and said, “Nothing! I don’t believe in supporting fake over-commercialized holidays.”
Oh, how I love a man with principles! But respectfully? I disagree, and was incredibly pleased, to say the least, when he agreed to sneak away with me to a waterfront inn this evening.
I know, right?
And he said he didn’t want to celebrate!
But then I found an offer online for 50% off all their rooms—a Father’s Day special, one night only—and boom! The Holy Spirit took over from there. Truly, I am most excited. My hardworking hubby gets a chance to unwind and *I* get a room with a whirlpool.
(That, my friend, is called a win-win situation.)
Now please don’t be jealous ‘cause we really need this getaway! Our summertime calendar is covered with soccer-colored vomit and, as much as I love being outside and active, sometimes we just need to pull the plug on being mom & dad and focus on being man and wife.
To that end, I have a list of seven things that you might do to honor your husband today and always. I speak from 20 years’ experience in sharing this list and hope that it blesses you as much as it’s blessed me.
(Number 7 is my personal favorite—at least, today it is!)
(Also? The inspiration for this blog post came to me during my holy hour this morning, so I have only a couple hours to write it before the kids wake up and we leave for Mass. So I’m cobbling it together quickly because I really wanted to share it with you. No time for links or lots of extra photos!)
Here we go!
1. Make peace with their passion. In our case, it’s soccer. And then soccer. And…soccer. For the past couple of years, I really struggled with this—with envy over all the time he spends with our kids and regret over what he “should” be doing instead. What a lot of wasted energy on my part! I see now that he’s a better dad for having this hobby. He loves soccer and his enthusiasm is catching. If you can’t beat ‘em, join em!—and I’ve found great peace in doing so.
2. Get a copy of the book The Love Dare and do little bits along the way. I like to pick it up and turn to the lesson for the day—for example, today’s the 17th so I’d turn to Day 17, which is “Love promotes intimacy.” I have found untold riches in this book, and I love that the authors weave Sacred Scripture throughout.
3. Give your guy a massage now and then! It’s a great—and economical—way to serve him, and if you’ve ever had one done professionally, you know the “tricks of the trade” and can make it extra special. I like to light a candle and play “relaxing massage music” on YouTube. (It’s a thing; I googled it.)
4. Hold your tongue as much as possible. I can’t encourage you in this area enough. Don’t complain. Don’t send snarky texts. If he does something that’s not quite to your satisfaction, let it go and offer it up. Take the high road. Be noble. Be kind.
5. Be present and mindful during love-making. Turn your thoughts off as much as possible. It will be so much better for both of you!
6. Let him lead, especially when your egos clash. There are many times in a marriage when you want one thing and he wants another. Let him lead! It’s God’s plan for a marriage! I have failed miserably at this over the years but can tell you, in all honesty, that the “My way or the highway” doesn’t work long term. Be regal. Be a queen. Honor your man. Let him lead.
7. Finally, and this is specific to it being Father’s Day, make a list with the kids of “Be-Dad-itudes”! I got this idea from Dr. Gregory Popcak’s book of the same name and am personalizing the phrase for my own ill gain. 😉 Basically, we’re all contributing to a list of things that make him him—similar to Our Lord’s Beatitudes but personalized. “Blessed is our dad for being obnoxious about doing soccer drills in the basement” and so forth. I’ve told the kids to have fun with this because John can dish it out but he can also take it.
It’s one of the many things I love about him.
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Have a blessed & beautiful Father’s Day, dear friend! May God bless your union today and always. 💕
Your marriage advice has really helped me out over the years. I do appreciate it. <3