It’s almost Christmas, (as you probably know), and once again I am learning the difference between what brings me peace and what does not.
Baking with my 2-year-old does not bring peace.
I do it for Advent penance.
Donating 25 bags’ worth of household goods & clothing definitely brought me peace.
PLEASE don’t tell the fire marshal that all this stuff was in our basement.
How about eating clean and exercising daily?
You tell me. I wouldn’t know.
And then there are all those “coping” mechanisms—our habits, you know? For good or for worse. The other night I was completely spent, so I poured myself a glass of Merlot and sat down to a Lewis & Clark documentary on Netflix. My five-year-old promptly crawled into my lap and I thought, “How sweet! This is really cozy.” I may have even been guilty of intellectual pride that my kindergartener was watching “smart” TV with me, but then…
My son, never known for his tact or diplomacy, demanded, “Why are you so desperate for wine all the time?” Wow, really? What five-year-old talks like that? It doesn’t matter. His words were like a peace-destroying bomb. The wine lost its flavor; the cozy moment, gone.
Okay, so, I’m not trying to get all heavy here. Kids do talk—they talk non-stop—and we can’t get all sensitive when their words sting. I did wonder if God was sending a subtle message about how my Advent has been progressing. Out of the mouths of babes, you know? I don’t know, but I’m trying harder to prepare my heart for Our Savior’s birth.
I’m trying to seek Him more than Santa, i.e. food & drink & all that transitory peace.
I’m sneaking fewer Christmas cookies before it’s time.
To that end and despite being incredibly busy, I’m committed to reading this month’s Well Read Mom selection. Yes, Virginia, this book brings me peace! I’ve even gone all OCD and planned out the reading in do-able chunks. “Let’s see, there are 290 pages…and our meeting’s in just three short weeks…so reading 16 pages per day will get ‘er done!”
(Anal much? Why yes I am.)
And plus it’s just a wonderful book, even better than that glass of wine.
I’m just sayin’.
You know me.