It’s either hormones or Holy Week or both, but the tears have been flowing fast and furious. I cried throughout most of the Palm Sunday Mass yesterday: streams of tears that left lines in my makeup and caused my husband to squeeze my arm consolingly.
“Smile!” he whispered, and I feebly tried…though I can’t say I was successful. I started to think about all the sin in this world. I thought about anger & fighting & divorce. I thought about drinking & drugs & pornography. I thought about losing my kids to other religions or–even worse–losing them to complete indifference.
Not surprisingly, I ended up plenty sad.
There is so much for which Our Savior died.
(There’s never a dull moment in my mind, which would be why I don’t watch reality TV.)
(Are you kidding me? I’m living it.)
…to this:
All in the space of a single day.
It feels great to get outside with the kids again! It feels great to get out and not need my boots.
Also? For the {visual} record, this is what 10 extra pounds look like on my five-foot frame. Most of it is around my middle–an unhealthy location, to be sure–though my backside, too, is also “blessed.”
And THAT’S why I’m trying to lose 10 pounds.
Should I be doing it publicly, though? Help me out, please, by taking this quick quiz.
I’m thankful for being blessed with so much that our kitchen counter usually looks like this:
(I titled this picture “Counter Clutter,” which is not be confused with “Counter Culture.”)
(Though certainly I hope that we’ve got that, too.)
I am thankful, too, for great library finds!
Note: I just took a picture of all the educational stuff. What I’m not showing is Angela’s tottering stack of Garfield books.
And finally…”finally” for this post anyway…I am thankful for this kid.
This kid. This kid. Let’s just say if he’s not sitting on the table then he’s pointing (and screaming) at the door to go out, and if he’s not pointing (and screaming) at the door to go out, he’s banging on my chest to “request” that I nurse him.
Nurse; take him outside; scoop him off of the table; repeat.
This is my day, my very real day.
If I’m hormonal, blame the nursing toddler. : )
I voted yes, because it's helpful to ME, but I want to say ONLY if it's also helpful to you. 🙂 If it's hard or discouraging to you, please don't!
I'm glad it's helpful to you, Sheila; that's really the whole point.
Besides, you know, fitting into that old pair of capris. ; )
I worry about my children also. This beautiful faith that we need and must pass on to them that is so different then this society we live in right now…that there is no truth. But, other moms are living it. Their children are away. I pray for them. I pray God is merciful.
I love that baby sitting on the table. That is total cuteness…and I think you look beautiful.
God IS merciful and God is pure love. We need to have faith in this–in Him–in us. Yes, we screw up, as do our kids, but God is so much bigger than all that.
Have a blessed & beautiful Holy Week, Christine.
I teared up all through Palm Sunday Mass too…I always do. I get all choked up on the parts we, as the crowd, are supposed to say. I can't say those things. It hurts. I choked up because I want my holy week to be better than my whole lent was.
You did not HAVE to link up, I hope it did not cause you extra stress!
I love baby on counter. I know those screams. I have a over 2 year old that can't talk much, so yes, there are a lot of screams. All day long. He may not want my breast, but he sure wants mama!!
Loved the ONE warm day we had. Looking forward to the next.
I voted no. I like your updates but don't need your numbers. I just want you to be happy. (and healthy)
Happy Holy Week….God bless you friend!
Thank you for seeing the big picture, Jamie. Yes, "being happy" is what I want…for ALL of us. God bless you too, Honey.
Oh Margaret, I am so happy you were tearing up too!!!! I thought I was the only one. Part of my reason was with my pastor. I was sad about something he said and did. 🙁 The other part was I realized how terribly I have been eating this Lent. I also gained 10 pounds since December. I find your scale shots very encouraging! I need to get back to under 130!!!!!!!!!! It will happen. As soon as the chocolate is finished. (HA!)
Joan, I've seen your photos of Facebook. You look beautiful and you ARE, both inside and out.
That is one seriously cute toddler. His habits seem much like those of my own little tyrant. We love her, but oh my she has very decided opinions about so many things.
THANK YOU for the reference to your own little tyrant. That's the perfect metaphor for my little man, and thinking of you & yours will make it easier.
(Seriously, could he be a bigger noncomformist?)
I was tearing up at Palm Sunday services, too, but mine was with joy not sadness. Before Mass started the Deacon asked for 2 servers because the ones who were scheduled didn't show up. My son, who has only served twice since he was 1st trained Catholic Schools Week a few weeks ago. He jumped out of his seat and looked at me. "Can I go, mom?" The excitement to serve. Makes me feel like all of my blunders in this parenting gig can't be all wrong when he wants to serve his God in church. ~tears~ Of course things were a little different since it was a special Mass but he did great. And he was so proud after church. Ever my sports jock, "mom, I did a great job as a walk on." Yes, you did. 🙂
That's beautiful. I would have cried with joy too. ♥
You look great darlin'. Seriously. Look at those beautiful curves. You may not like them, but I think you look great. Personally, I think you're going to have a difficult time losing until you wean. Your body is fighting for those pounds. 😉
Happy Holy Week. Pray for me! Please!
Upping the ante on my prayers for you, Barbara, and thanking you for your kind reference to my "curves". A modern Jane Russell, that's me! (Just don't ask me to sell bras on television.)
Nice to know that I am in such good company with crying during Palm Sunday Mass. I bet that every year I tear up in church during holy week – I held on until communion this Sunday. Short story – I would always go to the Easter Vigil Mass with my Grandpa. It was only the two of us which you know is VERY special in big families. When I was maybe 10 I was sitting there with him in the dark with candles glowing and I just started to weep. All I could think of was that some day Grandpa was going to die and I would not get to go to Easter Mass with him that year. Gosh, it makes me cry just thinking about it. Anyway, he was so sweet and never even asked why I was crying but gave me his hanky and a little hug which made me cry all the more. Anyway, I think that your tearing up in Mass just shows what a good Mom you are!
Say, Barbara has it right, you DO look great. I wish my body curved in all the right places like that!
Hope you have a warm day there in MN. It is supposed to be nice here at least for Easter – all the more to look forward to. Have a wonderful Holy Week!
Betsy, that's a beautiful (and bittersweet!) story. What a sweet, sweet memory to have of your Grandpa.
Much love! ♥
Also a melancholic/sanguine. It's exhausting, isn't it? I also think your curves look fantastic on you. The goal is to feel well, though, right? That's mine, and I have a long, long way to go, but have been so tired with a wakeful wee one that's it's hard to even think about exercise. And, why is it we crave crappy food when we're tired and not apples and spinach? But, maybe, that's just me. The sanguine spin on the sins of the world and of those of those so close to our hearts is that God's grace is so powerful and His Heart so merciful that the worst, filthiest sins can be forgiven and a sinner saved in a moment. And, the Faith is as much of a paradox as the melancholic/sanguine temperament! Thanks be to God! 🙂
We have a LOT in common, Suzanne. I've been reading your blog and yes, lots & lots in common. : )
Much love!
I also teared up during Mass, but in fact they were tears of Joy! You see, I was in Phoenix for a conference and I think God brought me to the little basilica next to the conference center just so Father could hear my confession. My friends and I planned on going to Mass together, but confession wasn't planned by me. All in God's plan as they say. So after a wonderful confession and a beautiful Mass one that was so different than Mass at home (singing in Latin, English and Spanish) I was tearing up too. Isn't it great that we can go to Mass anywhere in the world and feel right at home? How blessed we are. PS. I love the feet shot. Pretty toes!
Tears of joy during Mass are wonderful, Deb–such a consolation. ♥
Ok, how ridiculous is it to tear up at this post because I missed Palm Sunday Mass!! I don't think I've ever missed. All is good now, but our 4yo was in the hospital overnight for observation after an allergic reaction. Definitely not how I thought the weekend would go.
I agree with Barbara; you are beautiful. Until I became a mother, I didn't have curves. Sometimes it's hard to reconcile myself with my current shape because it's not how I've been for most of my life and I long to be less curvy. I suppose by the time I'm used to the curves, I'll loose half of them (and I do mean the upper half).
It's funny ("funny" in a rather sad way) how conditioned we women are to want to be stick thin. It's also funny (in a "what a coincidence" way) that the same morning I took that "overweight" picture above, my husband came downstairs and said, "You look nice today!"
Much love, Suzanne. : )