[One Day Out]
So yesterday was the feast of Our Lady of Sorrows and we didn’t do a whole lot, unfortunately, other than go to Mass in the morning (me) and talk about how Mary really “gets” our suffering.
(Me again, while the rest of the family listened dutifully).
“She had seven great sorrows,” I said, waving my prayer book. “Does anyone know any of them?”
“Um…” replied Joe, “when Jesus died?”
Oh my goodness, how quickly they forget! This is why we review, right? And is not to say, Joe honey, that you weren’t correct, technically, but rather, you lacked conviction.
The thing is, I need Our Lady to “get” my suffering because I can’t make much sense of it on my own. It’s a “How does one deal with all this uncertainty?” kind of thing, along with an (un)healthy dose of “There’s a ton of crap going on in the world and I’d do well not to think about it too much.”
But I do think about it too much, you know?
And that old troll Depression is knocking at my door.
(You may remember that I struggle with this. I don’t usually get hit with postpartum depression; instead, it shows up when I’m pregnant.)
(Which is really convenient, actually, because I have so little else going on right now.)
In any case! Moving away from the sarcasm and toward the truth, I am seeing a Catholic therapist tomorrow.
Simply making the appointment gives me hope.
In other news, the hu’band and I went on a date Friday night.
I asked Cate to take our picture before we left.
And is saying that *I* did the asking even necessary? As in, this is simply not something the hu’band would do.
“Dad,” Cate cajoled, “You need to smile with your teeth showing.”
Speaking of having fun, have you been taking to heart the advice in this post? It is interesting to note that, at this writing, this post has had close to 2,000 page views. (In general, my posts get from 200-300.)
Clearly, something struck a chord. I will say that despite my being BIG WITH CHILD, I am doing my best to stay faithful to this goal. Yesterday we even met it…twice!
[blush]
[Love me that 2nd Trimester Stride]
“Twice in one day!” I exclaimed. “What do you think?”
“It’s a good start,” he grinned.
Otherwise, we are still busy busy busy being us. Lots of housework, lots of homeschooling, lots & lots of other stuff. “You’ve certainly got your hands full!” I am often told, to which I reply…
And plus it keeps me out of the bars.
I too suffer with pregnancy depression. I have never met anybody else who does as well!! It is the weirdest thing because I can "feel" it sitting in the middle of my chest but the minute I have the baby it disappears! Needless to say that this makes being open to life difficult because I am so fearful of the depression. My prayers go up for you for a relief to the depression!
Roxaline, if you glance through my posts on the subject, you'll see that I've been on medication before–TWICE before when I was pregnant. My doctor (an amazing, Pro-Life, Catholic woman) did not hesitate to put me on low doses of…let me see here..Paxil the first time and Prozac the second. It did the trick almost instantly; the kids are fine; and I stopped the meds shortly after their births.
I will pray for you as well. ♥
your last sentence — that's it! The perfect response when I get the "Boy your hands are full" comment! I get it multiple times every single time I go anywhere, and I'm getting tired of always saying the same thing.
And you go mama, meeting your goals twice in one day. 😉
twice! 😀 i am always feeling ridiculously proud of myself and super *feminine* when we achieve that goal 😉
also i'm glad i'm not the only one who finds the 2nd trimester…. FUN 😀
This is why you are one of my favourite bloggers 🙂 All of this post. I'm sorry about the depression, I hope you get some good help and comfort – and I hope too it keeps you strong knowing its only temporary.
Congratulations on your decision to speak with someone! When I was pregnant with number six, I was at a point where I just couldn't. stop. crying. A friend strongly encouraged me to see a Catholic therapist as well, and it did me a world of good. Thank you for sharing that with your readers– there is still a stigma attached to doing that, and no one speaks about it.
My prayers are with you Margaret. BTW … you look just lovely in those photos!
Sorry to hear you are having problems beyond your control. I think that's the toughest aspect of health issues (at least for me and I suspect you are similar that way — stubborn!). No matter how hard we try we can't fix it alone. I hope you find an easy fix — one which allows you to enjoy the rest of your pregnancy and life to the fullest!
I'm off to the doctor to discuss which "flavor" of autoimmune disease I might have. I'll pray for you. You pray for me.
PS that bump has popped! Love it!
I was wondering if that *devotion* was what caused this baby? Thank God I have no no no no disinterest in giving my husband these gifts (and receiving from his generosity). I think it's because while we are using NFP to space out the babies, we take advantage of the limited times we can 🙂
Aww, I love that preggy photo. So cute! My pants are already feeling too tight, but I'm loath to move into my pregnancy clothes already. I'm not quite 16 weeks yet. I guess when it's your tenth pregnancy your body just wants to just fall right out there, huh? 🙁 I'm glad you were able to get away with the hubby, but I'm sorry to hear about your depression right now. I've been struggling a bit myself. I'm so tired; just worn down feeling. I spent the first half of the morning yesterday crying. Fortunately I was able to pull it together in time to enjoy the second half of the day. We took the kids up to the mountains to see if we could catch the early fall colors. It was nice.
You and the baby continue to be in my prayers. God bless you, Margaret.
You look wonderful by the way. Good for you guys getting it on in the bedroom and outside the bedroom(eating out)!
Hope you are feeling better soon. CANNOT wait to see that little baby boys face. Why does it take so long?!
Oh my, you look so beautiful pregnant (and otherwise I may add.) I am sorry to hear about your depression. I don't know if I had mentioned this before but I also have suffered with pre-partum depression (and post-partum I guess as well.) My doc. is very old school and would say, get out more, get some more exercise etc. and I suffered pretty bad through three pregnancies. Sounds crazy but it went away when I went gluten free and I did not get if with my last little guy at all. Have you ever been checked for that? There is a good list of other symptoms on this site. http://gluten-intolerance-symptoms.com/
And this company can test for gluten intolerance vs. celiac disease https://www.enterolab.com/default.aspx God Bless.
I've been happily married for 35 years (not happy every single minute, you understand, but happily married), and I just want to say "Amen" to your post! Also, I'm glad you're seeing a therapist. Most of us probably should. It took me until I was 58! (about a year ago)…and it probably "should" have been forty or fifty years sooner. 🙂 Proud of you for so many reasons.
You are a very blessed woman. I've been married for 13 years, for about 7 of those years husband and I slept in separate rooms. We're in the same room now but he hasn't slept with me in 3 years. His choice, not mine. :'( Retrouvaille hasn't even helped. I LOVE him more than life, in spite of this very flawed area.
I long & desire a large family but know this is not possible. You are so blessed.
Me.
Last line wins the internets. I'm totally stealing it the next time someone gives me flak for the seven.
I've been reading for awhile but this is my first time to reply. I just wanted to say how encouraging your words are. Also, when someone says how full my hands or days are, I like to say "I am so thankful they are full and not empty!" I just had our fifth child in September and I am so thankful for each one. I've lost seven children early in pregnancy and people cannot understand the pain that comes with that "unrecognized" loss. But it makes me love more fully when I remember the pain and I look forward to meeting them. I know that my end will be a wonderful beginning when I meet them.
From a Northern Minnesota Mom