I am afraid that I must share with you a rather indelicate revelation: my home’s been infected with piles.
I am not talking about this unmentionable condition. (Except….if it’s so very unmentionable, then why for heaven’s sake am I linking to it?)
No. Rather, I am referring to a superficial and unsightly condition that is brought on by busy-ness and distractedness and which manifests itself by the following symptoms:
- Large outcroppings of piano books and music sheets scattered here and there upon the floor and chairs surrounding the piano, and on (but never in) the piano bench itself.
- Massive heaps of clean but slightly wrinkled laundry. There are large outbreaks both on the dining room floor and in the master bedroom. Best to avoid these places.
- An impressive rash of cookbooks and recipe cards that were culled from the shelf one week ago and left to fester on the dining room table. (Laughably, the local chef had plans to actually plan a menu.)
- An additional rash of arts & crafts materials (see outbreak listed directly above)
- And finally, in heaps and stacks and piles of literary material, most of it “caught” at the local library and practically none of it contained.
I think I may be the one responsible for transmitting this condition, because I remember my husband once referring to me as “Maggie of the Many Piles.” I have been known to say (with my actions if not my words) “I’ll just set this here for the moment.”
And then, as you know, the moment passes. Before you know it, you’ve got…piles.
Fortunately this domestic disease responds well to aggressive treatment. Therefore, if you should wonder where I’ve gone and want to find me, I’ll be the one in the two-story home marked “quarantine.” Should you choose to come by bearing hot coffee and lots of fresh-baked goods, that’d be grand.
I’ll see you Monday. : )