I don’t know what it’s like for other people who have a blog, but I think that I might ultimately measure the worth of a post by the insecurity I feel when first publishing it. I struggled with doubt throughout most of the day yesterday, worrying that my “Food for Thought” post was self-absorbed, self-indulgent, and in general, far too weighty (excuse the pun) to appeal to the majority of my readers. I really wanted to go back and delete it, because I am just that insecure a person.
Instead I [tried to] pray for the grace to be strong and I definitely offered up prayers of thanksgiving for those kind, sweet souls who chimed in to say that they’ve been praying for me. (This despite that little voice that kept whispering, “Praying for me? But I’m not worth it!”)
You see? Turning to food for comfort is a sign of something much, much deeper…and some of your comments have confirmed this.
And that’s all I have to say about this for today, because not everyone struggles with emotional eating! In fact, I have a couple of beautiful, blogging friends out there who manage to stay slim and beautiful throughout their entire pregnancy!! Not that this sort of thing should be my primary goal, of course, because that would be vanity on my part.
A healthy relationship with food, though? A love of food but an even greater love of life? Such things are worth their weight in salt!
(Or potato chips…or pretzels…or peanut M&M’s…)
Ad Jesum per Mariam,
Sorry for the mishap– reposting:
Good morning from snowy S Dakota!
Food is a big issue. Long time phrases that still annoy us is another big thing– both also assail me from time to time. The fact that some beautiful women stay graciously slim throughout all of their lives is wonderful, but it is really not related to your enjoyment of a good thing– food. I highly recommend a recent book “Rethinking thin”–it as really changed this whole business upside down for me. The author is delightful (I saw a utube video of her being interviewed when I googled about it) and very sympathetic.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=10354959
We all have insecurities: I don’t usually blog about mine, but when you blog about yours I see that as courageous and helpful and smart. Our blogs reflect, I think, what is helpful to us–mine is an artistic outlet I did not have before, and so much more. God Bless you!
Yeah, Margaret, seems to me that people who read blogs like yours do so because they’re interested in the topics you tend to cover. Giving your personal take on something in a way that people might find interesting, encouraging, enlightening, inspiring, etc. doesn’t make a post self-indulgent or self-absorbed.
Now, maybe if you posted a bunch of pictures of your cats or something, I might consider that self-indulgent. (But then, I don’t like cats.)
Don’t fall into the trap of thinking slim=beautiful. I have no doubt that your friends ARE beautiful but it probably has little to do with their dress size and scale and more to do with the feeling of carrying another human being inside them and knowing they are working with God to bring another soul into the world.
There are many GORGEOUS pregnant women that are plump and fluffy and round. Just because they don’t look like they have their old bodies or a slim body plus a basketball under their shirt doesn’t make them not beautiful.
A healthy lifestyle is what is important, not the scale. There is also nothing wrong with enjoying treats, as long as you are enjoying them for the right reason and in moderation.
I’m not offended or angry or trying to preach, I hope you understand.
I’ve battled and battled with my self-image for a very very long time, and also with an unhealthy relationship with food. I have a ton of weight to lose after this baby (all gained before pregnancy) but I don’t want to do it because I want to fit into a certain size or see a number on the scale. I want to *feel* better and I want to get my GP off my back as she is jonesing to put me on a statin. Both my parents had multiple bypasses before 65. My father before 60 both are overweight. I’d rather not go down that path.
My husband still finds me attractive, my kids like how ‘gushy’ mom is…..I try and see the bright side of being ‘fluffy’. Heck, if there is a famine I have plenty of fat stores and will have no issues with my milk supply!!
P.S. You have guts about posting that I certainly don’t have. Kudos!
PPS. Never in a million years would I qualify you or your blog as self indulgent or self-absorbed. Anything but.
It takes great humility, which is admirable, to post many of the things you do.
Do you want to know why I love your blog so much? It is because you are honest (okay, and darn funny) and you write about what many of us are experiencing. It was funny because yesterday I wondered why people were telling you not to be so hard on yourself, that they were praying for you, etc. I was like, “What? Doesn’t everybody feel this way?” You have so many people that are right there with you in the trenches of life and thought. Thank you for being there for us.
Margaret,
I think more people indulge in emotional eating that you think (in other words, you and I are in good company!).
And I think it’s perfectly normal to focus on eating when we’re pregnant. (I was actually thinking about this yesterday while I was laying under the nuclear imaging machine trying to focus on my rosary :o).) We focus so much on every thing we put in our mouths when we’re nourishing our babes that it’s hard to not get carried away. I can think of worse things to eat than apple pie! Just stay away from those Doritos, ok?
Some of us thin people are skinny on accident, not because we don’t indulge or eat to soothe our weary spirits!
Just thought I’d let you know. It’s a genetic quirk. 🙂
I think Jennie has a good point. I was thinking about this post while I was in the car today. I really have a hard time being pregnant because I am one prone to gain alot of weight. It’s part of having thyroid disease. The hormones throw my levels off, and even after they are stabilized, I gain between 45-65 pds. I always wanted to be like my thinner friends when they were pregnant. I have a friend who gains fifty pds with each baby and loses it all within the first four weeks after delivery. And, she’s the one who looks as though she has a basketball under her shirt and hasn’t gained any weight anywhere else. Not me. It takes me over a year to get to only having those last 15 or so to lose (David is almost 16 months old and I’m only back to my prepregnancy weight through Weight Watchers and running three times a week…it’s hard work!). Anyway, my point is that this baby of yours seems to do be doing so well. This pregnancy is going well so far, and any fears you have you really need to give to God. He is in control. You have to try to really, practically give all your worries over to Him, even what your eating. You have the rest of your life to get that baby weight off, and you are beautiful when you are pregnant because you are you. Not someone else. Like Jennie said, a lot that is genetics, not because they are not eating what you’re eating (my friend I just mentioned could eat me under the table!). Sorry I’m rambling and not making a lot of sense here. I’m nursing at the keyboard and it’s making me lose my train of thought! I love you!
OK, Here goes. I’ve followed lots of Catholic Mom Blogs for the past year and a half, and now I’m stepping out into the comment world!!! Thank you so much for your post about food. I am also pregnant. 12 weeks, w/baby number 5, and boy nothing calms the nausea better than keeping the mouth full of food!! Add to that the fact that I’m exhausted and spend my days alternating btwn couch and bed, and I’ve already gained 10 pounds. What does the baby weigh??…….. maybe a couple of ounces!! Everyone tells me I must be having twins because of my size already, and while I secretly hope that I could use that as an excuse, I know that it’s all just…..well FAT!!! I too am an emotional eater. I have a love affair with food (particularily anything of the potatoe chip variety) and I keep using the pregnancy as an excuse to indulge. Mix in the fact that I’m feeling totally overwhelmed with the responsibly of another baby, and I’m being brought down by the constant negative comments about being pregnant again from people in a world who don’t value children the way I do, and…….well there goes any self restraint I have!! You have opened my eyes to the sinful nature of my eating and have inspired me to take this serioulsy. Now don’t get me wrong, you will probably still hear me saying “I’m eating for two!!” but I’ll feel better because I know I’m not alone.
Thanks so much Margret in Minnisota,
Shawna in Okotoks, Alberta
Because of your courageous blogging, all the helpful words of wisdom from the comments help me, too. So I imagine you’re helping so many of us.
Oh Margaret, you absolute dear. I eagerly clicked on the links because it’s always a treat to see a glowing pregnant mommy, and I was shocked to see myself! You are a sweetheart. And let me just say that the flip side of being a skinny preggo with basketball belly is that you wind up with tummy skin so stretched out it looks like a plucked chicken. I’ve got folds and wrinkles there you could lose your keys in. 😉 My belly looks like one of those dogs with the wrinkly skin, what do you call ’em?
Not to mention this skinny frame comes with spaghetti arms that cannot open a jar to save my life! Seriously, if I got bitten by a deadly snake and had the antidote in a jar, they’d find me on the ground with the jar clutched in my feeble hands and an “I can’t get this blasted jar open to save my life” grimace frozen on my dead face. Pathetic. 🙂