Ah yes.
I am once again the mother of a newborn and my nights are not my own.
The first night home from the hospital was the worst. I was up until 4:00 a.m. with a very fussy baby, at which point I woke my husband and said, “I can’t do this anymore.”
He was groggy but got up to spot me…
…and I collapsed in a quivering heap upon the bed.
It has since gotten much better, thankfully. I fill up little Anthony’s tank before retiring and hand him over to my husband, who then tucks his son away in a sling and keeps doing whatever it is my husband does when I’m passed out.
We’re on two different shifts, that man and me.
And then, around 2:00 a.m. or so, John will bring me a hungry baby. Having had a good four hours of sleep at that point, I feel (more or less) rested and gather up my son to nurse him.
Still.
I like to feed him in my bedroom recliner so that when he’s finished—schlorp!—I detach him like a cork and we fall asleep….a mommy and her son in a La-Z-Boy recliner.
Here’s the thing, though. It’s a light sleep—How could it not be?—and my dreams are often anxious. We’re talking really anxious. We’re talking here’s the story that I have as a result.
I dreamt that I was sleeping on the living room couch. I woke (in my dream) to see that there was someone in the kitchen—a prowler!—and I was terrified. Being in a dreamlike state, however, I could neither run nor yell for help.
Or could I?
I woke up (really woke up) to the sound of a subhuman groan. It was me! And the noise that was coming out of my mouth was startling.
It was like I was screaming…under water.
It was so weird.
My husband sat bolt upright and stared at me. “Margaret? Are you alright?”
He was so completely confused and concerned that I got the giggles. And then we heard the dog’s collar rattling on the landing—she’s not allowed to come upstairs without permission—and when John went to check on her, he said that she was peering up with her head cocked in bewilderment. “What in the world,” you just knew she was thinking, “Was that?”
Over in my recliner, I continued to giggle as my husband lay there, weirded out.
I’m still giggling!
Days later.
Do you have any middle-of-the-night feeding stories to share? If so, I’d love to hear them.
Ad Jesum per Mariam,
Ellen says
Not feeding stories, but I have on more than one occasion woke up screaming from a dream. And I hate to say, the s word was one that I screamed. Must have been a pretty horrible dream!
Jennifer says
I was just always surprised when I woke up hours later with the baby in my arms.
Ken Wills says
My story is not a night time feeding story but a funny, too me, feeding story. My wife and I had our first child. As new parents often do, we worried about everything with our new son. At one point he was not responding as we would like when we called his name. I had handed him to my wife to feed him. A short time later I decided to test his hearing. I was in front of my wife and behind our son. I clapped my hands very loudly. Brandon whipped his head around without unlatching, my wife screamed. I was rather proud of my self for having successfully tested his hearing. My wife informed me that I should NEVER test his hearing in that manner while she was feeding.
Jenn says
Oh, many feeding stories. I did laugh out loud at Ken’s story as I know the feeling of a little head whipping around without unlatching (OUCH!).
Anyway, I used to feed the twins in a special “twin” boppy pillow on the couch so I could nurse them both and try to get them back to sleep. Imagine waking up to an older child standing in front of you staring as you lay with your head back on the couch with 2 little babies and 2 breasts hanging out for the world to see. I was such a sight!
Also, when 1 woke up to eat in the middle of the night I woke the other one as well…until they were about 4 months old. Then I started thinking that the one still sleeping was sure to sleep through the night, so I wouldn’t wake the 2nd one. Only after I nursed the first and put him back to bed, the 2nd would wake 20 minutes later and so I had sleepless nights from about 4-6 months old.
I definately don’t envy you those sleepless nights! Good luck!
scmom (Barbara) says
No stories, just sympathy. Many a night I walked the floors with a fussy baby. Many a night I cried, and cried and walked the floors with a fussy baby. I don’t do sleep deprivation well. When I was pregnant I did not dread labor, I dreaded first night home instead.
Jen says
I know I have some, but can’t think of any. I bring the baby in the bed with me because when I had Keith and was still in the hospital, I remember passing out while nursing him and waking up to him almost falling out of my arms. After that, I just bring them to bed. I tend to get very sleepy while nursing in those early weeks. Go prolactin!
Okay..I guess I did have a story. LOL!
Jamie says
I don’t have nursing stories, but lots of prego dreams right now, terrible ones. Ones where I am dying. Last week, in the dream, the morning of the C-section, I knew I was going to hemmorage and was quick trying to plan what my husband was to do with our new baby and 4 others. It was terrible. Just this last night, I had some disease no one could figure out, it was catchy too, I started bleeding all over my body and once that happened they knew I was dying soon.
Why the weird blood/dying dreams?
Last week, I did dream our sweet baby was born with red hair and a face full of freckles! (my hubby wants a red head) Most babes are not born with freckles already are they?
I hope you get some sleep Mags!
Carrie says
We need your husband to do a “guest post.” I want to hear this story from his perspective! God bless him.
Nine (+) Texans and friends... says
When I dream, I often dream very vividly. I often wake in that confused state not knowing what is real and what isn't. I also startle very easily. Put the two together?
I was dreaming, I was scared in the dream. Someone (who shall remain nameless) woke me up by jumping on me and I slapped them, HARD, right across the face before I realized who it was and that I was awake.
Count yourself lucky to have a hand with nighttime parenting. My dh, wonderful as he is, doesn't really 'do' nighttime parenting. His answer to me needing to sleep is to let the baby cry. >( He's gotten up a handful of times when there is a crisis…like when I was up nursing and a sick older child came downstairs and passed out in my arms.
Sarah says
Oh, Gosh! Thanks for the huge chuckle this morning! You have no idea how badly I needed to laugh . . . what a detoxing laugh it was! Sorry it was at your expense, but you did put it out here. 🙂
Theresa says
I know that sound. It only happened to me once and I will never forget it, it was that bizarre. I was pregnant, not nursing, and had a dream similar to yours–someone frightening was in the house–and I was terrified, struggling to wake up to the sound of my own primal screaming. It was different from any normal nightmare, that’s for sure.
Hormones are something else, aren’t they?
Elizabeth says
Having all the worry dreams of a mom to be…baby #4 due in Nov and I am a 24/7/9month nauseated mom…even in the middle of the night…yuck. It makes for some terrible times. Usually I can count on not feeling sick when I am actually sleeping…but then, when I wake with a horrible dream I get to fell sick and worried!
Thanks for the chuckle, though…
just remember…this too, will pass. And God Bless your DH!!!
Melanie B says
Oh I woke up this morning from a terrible dream about terrorists and mass murder. Very scary.
Your Anthony sounds so much like my Bella when we brought her home from the hospital. (I won’t tell you how long we had to do the sleeping in shifts thing lest you get discouraged. I’m sure he’ll be better than she was.) I wish our bedroom had room for my recliner definitely my favorite place to fall asleep with fussy newborn who won’t sleep.
Don’t forget to offer up those sleepless nights. I tend not to be so saintly and don’t think of such things at four in the morning. Yeah, I tend more toward cuss words. But I’m going to try this time not to waste it.
So many funny stories. Good thing we can laugh about them in retrospect.
Marcie in Canada says
Oh Margaret, thanks for the laugh. You always tell a story in such a way that it makes it wonderful to read!!!! Here’s my story: Baby #5 was just a few days old, and she was having a hard time getting a good latch. I had let her hurt me on one side, so getting her on was a challenge and a pain!! She wasn’t sleeping well yet, and my DH just happened to be awake when I was up with her at 3 in the morning. He turned over, and in a sleepy voice tried to give me some “advice.” I said a few things that a postpartum hormonal mom would say in the middle of the night when she can’t get a good latch. My poor husband told me that he saw a whole new woman that night! Oops!
RealMom4Life says
I cannot remember my strange dreams – just remember I did have them too. What’s with that?! But, I have to say ditto on the recliner. When we got rid of an old recliner couch that used to belong to my parents I said, I said OK, as long as we got a recliner before another pregnancy. I have to sleep in them the last few months as well as those late night feedings where you can just fall asleep…..
The Ironic Catholic says
I’m a big fan of co-sleeping (baby in bed). Granted you have to have a big bed and a safe set-up, but if you are nursing, I found it helps ENORMOUSLY with nighttime rest.
And given I’m about 5 months pregnant, you’re scaring me!
Alishia says
My first night home with our first daughter I didn’t have a plan other than a co-sleeper on my side of the bed. I didn’t communicate this to my husband (other than just its physical presence). Anyway, I nursed the baby and apparently fell asleep while doing so. My husband must’ve thought that was my plan because he shut the light off and went to bed.
Later I woke up very confused. Not yet used to having a baby yet aware of that little bed next to me I glanced over, no baby in the bed. I kinda worried for a moment until I looked down and she was in my arms. And so began a somewhat successful co-sleeping experience.
Of course, now that I have the third one home, I’m trying to remember and remind myself that they get past this stage where all they want is to sleep with my boob in their mouth all night long.
Heather Viz says
I was so tired one night sleeping in my recliner with my 6 week old, that I dreamed that she fell off of me. When I woke, it wasn’t a dream!!! She was fine, thanks be to God, but it scared me, and now I’m not sure how the sleeping arrangements will go when this new guy arrives. I’m just too frightened to try it again. Be careful baby. Also, you are a crazy woman for going out to a conference less than a week after giving birth. The only place I feel like going is to take a nap. Congratulations, and prayers are gouing up for you down here in the south.
MrsL says
This reminded me of one of the first nights home with our first. Hubby had fallen asleep with her in his arms and I had, drowsily taken her to feed later in the night. I put the baby in the crib across the room when she’d finished, still only half awake. Early the next morning, hubby woke me frantically searching the wadded blankets for the baby he’d fallen asleep with in his arms.
Anonymous says
Yes. When my 5th child was less than a week old (and I was VERY exhausted) I was sitting on the couch feeding him in the middle of the night. I woke up to him screaming and laying on the floor face first, I dropped him! I was so distraught I brought him to the other room and layed him in a safe spot (amazing how I was so concerned about not waking the other kiddos – that just kicked in). Then I ran bawling to get my husband. I could hardly tell him what happened I was crying so hard. Everything was fine. But, I always use the recliner now too!
Pablo says
These are attacks of the Devil.
Use Holy Water.. three prayers of exorcism with salt and water. Easiest place to get it is at an SSPX Chapel. Blessed Water does not work.
Also, a Roman Catholic ritual: Place a Saint Benedict medal in the four corners of your residence, hang a Saint Benedict crucifix inside your home, and ask Saint Benedict’s protection.
When Freemasons acquire consecrated hosts, they use them to call up demons to attack the souls of the faithful.
Engage in spiritual warfare. Use proper sacramentals and the help of saints, like Benedict.
God be with you all.
Anonymous says
I am a first time “brave soul” and I so enjoy your blog. I have four little ones, and with each of them, I occasionally fell asleep holding them in my bed while nursing. I would frequently dream that I had “lost” my child. In these frightening dreams I would search high and low for my baby, only to wake up to a babe in my arms! I never seem to learn as these dreams never fail to cause me much anxiety.
May God bless you and your precious family and thanks for sharing your delightful life with us! – Kelli
Anonymous says
I’ve had three little ones so far and can actually say that I have never had to get up and walk with them in the middle of the night. I know co-sleeping isn’t for everyone but the baby and I both get a good nights rest by sleeping together and nursing the few times they wake up.