Our first family-sized vehicle was a Honda Odyssey. How HUGE it seemed when I first started driving it. It terrified me, and yet…
…as you can see, I have since made the adjustment to driving largish vehicles.
One of the first things I did when we got the Odyssey was accessorize it–not with fuzzy dice or scented pine trees, mind, but rather…my opinion.
I’m so unique that way. An opinionated bumper sticker? Who’d have thought?
And then I thought about putting this bumper sticker right next to it–two black-eyed peas in a pod, as it were; similar shape, similar sentiment.
But I didn’t.
‘Cause that’d be mean.
Anyway, it’s Barbara who’s got me thinking about all this–Barbara along with the guy at the Science Museum yesterday. You see, Barbara told a story about a mean woman at the grocery store, and we sat behind a mean guy in the omnitheater.
See the connection?
We had settled in happily, the kids and I, and were watching Sea Monsters on the big screen. It was good, it was gripping, it was…interrupted by the guy who yelled at Felicity.
“Stop! Kicking! My! SEAT!!!”
Just like that.
I jumped to hear the sound of his voice; we all did. Each word was loud and accentuated, saving the heaviest emphasis for the source of his rage.
A seat that was being kicked by my daughter.
Now granted, that was probably really annoying. I’m sure it was, in fact, but did he need to yell? Suddenly I found myself thinking of all sorts of encounters–none of them kind and all of them starring a mother bear.
Tell me: Who’d be the mean one then?
The good news is there were no such encounters (the guy scooted out while we were gathering our things) and–best of all–we came away with a good story. Believe me, we told it again & again! (What can I say? They’re the kids of a blogger.) From there it evolved to how it’d have gone if it were George, with the guy yelling “Stop…drooling…on…my…shoulder!” and the guy in front of him yelling “Stop…yelling…in…the theater!” and on & on until finally the dinosaur on the screen holds up a sign that reads:
“Stop it, all of you!”
I explained to Felicity that the reason we do this–the reason we make light of a painful and/or embarrassing situation–is that it helps us to carry the little cross that God sent.
Laughing takes the sting away. It lessens the load and helps us not to brood.
Tell that one to the meanies.
I'm so sorry your sweetie had to endure that man's rudeness but it sounds like you did an awesome job turning it into a learning experience and helping her deal with the emotional ramifications of his actions. Good job, Mama Bear!
Ahhh, so sorry sweet Felicity had to be treated like that. It's so sad how words can just crush the spirits of children…and adults.
You handled it perfectly.
Great story indeed.
I went to a meeting sponsored by the archdiocese yesterday and was blatantly ignored by the staff who were handing out papers and taking attendance and whatnot. Was it because I brought all the kids? I can't imagine so. They were really well behaved. Almost saintly. I don't know, but I must confess to not seeing a funny side to it. Mean people indeed. It's almost enough to keep a new girl from volunteering. Almost. If I was doing it for the people, I'd walk, but I'm not, and He's not the one snubbing me. š
Oh give her a great big hug from me.
I'm more sensitive towards that kind of treatment regarding kids, espeacially when the kids are mine. The way you turned it around was great.
Luckily the last time I had a "mean" event happen seems to have been lost in memory. I'm sure there have been a few. But, I'd rather remember the good stuff anyway.
Oh wait, my older daughter and I went to mass at an old parish of ours recently. After mass we ran into Fr. X who remembered us. As we talked there were a few negative comments directed towards us for "leaving" that parish. The comments came from people we know and even a few from Fr. X. It was quite uncomfortable, more so because it was all said in front of my 13 year old.
We just smiled and I said some silent prayers for them. It wasn't the appropriate setting to discuss the reasons for our move. Besides we were there for Jesus…period.
I had to make a similar decision yesterday. My dd was riding her bike back from the mailbox. We have no sidewalks, our mailbox is a 1/2 mile away at the end of our street that is easily two cars wide with no stripes and little traffic.
She was helmeted and less than a foot from the edge of the road, there were no other cars or obstructions. She wasn't goofing around, she was just riding her bike home.
A neighbor driving down the street, pulled in behind her and honked at her all the way until she pulled into our driveway.
????
I was really tempted to go knock on his door as ask "WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!"
I didn't.
At least Grace wasn't publicly humiliated like poor Felicity.
When you said "a guy" yelled at poor Felicity, was that guy a grown man? I feel so sorry for that guy, he must have a lot of pent up negative/sad emotions to have lashed out at a child like that….
BTW your child is always YOUR child. I was helping my little girl, (23 year old college student at the time) pack up her apartment to move when the building owner came in and said a couple of negative comments to her!! I verbally clawed him for which I was very sorry for and went to confession once my blood pressure had gone down and my daughter was safely moved.
signed
Theresa in Alberta
oops, I ment to say "this mama bear verbally clawed him in defence of her cub".
Theresa in Alberta
While shopping at Ikea I saw a bumper sticker that said, "Be kind to animals, don't eat them". A nice sentiment I thought, but I'd go a bit further myself with this bumper sticker, "Be kind to humans, don't abort them". Do you think it would be a hit?
Oh that sweet little thing. I don't know if I could have kept my cool — aren't you a good mama? You received God's grace at just the moment you needed it. That man is an ogre — just tell Miss Felicity to put Shrek's face on the man's body and that will be an image to remember! Mean people really do…need to get a life.
I remember that bumper sticker!
i am shocked at how intolerant people have become, not that i don't encounter many, many kind souls on my way as well. i think the economy issues and the constant political back and forth (us against them on both sides) is creating a very hostile environment to live in. i pray that some balance is found.
Poor Felicity. I'm glad you were all able to laugh about it. Those things always give us one more person to pray for. If I ever go to a movie with you, she can kick my seat to her heart's content.
I am sorry for that man, that he did not have what he needed to simply ask Felicity in a polite and dignified tone. I hope the movie wasn't ruined for your girl.
My response to meanies is to be over-the-top apologetic and super-sweet. My hope is that it tells them I'm not pleased but gives them the opportunity to redeem themselves. Goodness only knows I appreciate it myself the times I inadvertently slide into grumpiness due to stress or tiredness.
HA! I thought of this post in Mass earlier today when a certain kid (not my own) would. not. stop. drumming. the. wooden. floor. with. his. shoes….I figured throwing my missal at the back of his head would earn me the "mean" award. I simply prayed for his mother to make him stop. Eventually, she heard him and ever so gently guided him to stop. I asked my husband if the drumming bothered him and he said he didn't hear it…I wonder if some people are more bothered than others with repeated hitting/drumming noises?? Even if they are, there is no reason to be rude or mean. A simple, polite request usually does the trick. You are a good mama, Margaret. š