Warning: the following post is of a nitty-gritty nature.
I don’t know how many of you checked back on the comments to my “Merry Christmas” post, (the one where I complained about getting a speeding ticket), but I wanted to share with you the following thoughts shared by Adoro te Devote:
Speaking as an ex-police officer….he was right. And for a $117 fine you had to have been WELL over the limit. And with children in your car.
Speed causes more accidents and deaths than anything else. And by it’s nature, speeding is often (although not always) through inattention…and that’s even worse.
Granted, the inattention was due to the children, but considering you have children in your vehicle, you have an even greater duty to them to pay attention to your speed.
I don’t mean to preach, not in any way, but I do feel it’s necessary to speak up for the cop. And considering that I’ve been in his shoes and I’ve seen sights that would haunt you to your dying day and through purgatory, well, please see his action as merciful and not condemning.
She is right. She is totally right and I commend her for upbraiding me. I was speeding; I was going 15 miles over the speed limit and even worse, I didn’t even realize it.
That’s pretty much the story of my life.
Always rushing toward the next event.
Always rushing toward the punch line.
Always rushing toward some symbolic horizon that, like “tomorrow”, never comes.
The words of Adoro te Devote have given me pause. I was so quick to be indignant over the insult of being ticketed—so quick to turn to humor instead of reflection.
Forgive me. I was wrong to have done so.
I am feeling the need to slow down in many ways. I am trying so hard to hear God speak to me this Advent, and yet so far I cannot hear but for the din of all my activity.
It’s go go go, you know?
I promise Him I’ll pray before I check my email in the morning, and then I don’t.
I apologize to Him for writing my post before reading my Bible, and then I do all over again the next day…and the next day after that…and the next day after that.
So I’m going to slow down and I ask you to bear with me. Some days this blog is funny and some days it’s just not. I had a very happy post in the works for the feast of St. Nicholas—We’re pregnant! Thank you, St. Nicholas!—but now I’ve just heard from the clinic and yesterday’s blood draw shows that my hCG level has not gone up since the last one.
Yes, this is the very special intention for which I am praying St. Andrew’s novena. I would be six weeks along on Thursday.
Nothing is certain and I’ll let you know when I know.
Meanwhile, I may be more quiet than usual and I may not be posting on a daily basis.
For me, that’s so unlikely, I know…
…and yet, it’s what I’m thinking I need to do.
With love and blessings and a humble request for prayers (just one or two, if you can spare them),
Denise says
Oh Margaret…I know I don’t know you…but I can certainly relate to the desire to have another baby…
My prayers are with you!
I’ve been reading here for a while, commenting occasionally and I just wanted to say how much i enjoy reading about your life.
You have opened yourself up on this blog…shared your excitement, your heartbreak, your worries, your guilty feelings, your wicked good sense of humor.
Your blog is all the things I read a blog for 😉
Certainly, blogs can be a waste of time, a way to indulge…but they can also be places to learn about our faith and our vocation as moms, a place to connect with like-minded folk, and I think yours does that for many readers.
So I’m rambling here, but I just wanted to offer you my sincere prayers.
God Bless you and Keep you…..
Mommy Bear says
Sweetie, I’m doubling my prayers for you. I, too, am go go go. My hubby constantly reminds me to “stay present”, tho’ I seldom do.
Here’s to doubling hCg #’s…
God bless you!
nutmeg says
Praying for your new little one…. and many many hugs to you, dear friend.
Jenn says
Maggie, I’m so sorry for the recent news. I know those numbers can go up and I’ll be saying extra prayers for just that.
We’ll be at the MN zoo on Friday if you feel like a spontaneous trip. Let us know!
Momto5Minnies says
I am keeping you in my prayers too!
It is so hard to slow down, but I hope that you can find a way to … then please share with us how you accomplished that 😉
Many (((HUGS)))) from another mommy to 5!
Michelle says
Margaret, I’m praying for you and for your baby.
Matilda says
Offering up lots here for you tonight!
Alice Gunther says
I’ll be praying my heart out for you, Margaret.
+JMJ+ says
A heartfelt Hail MAry already ascending…
I am awed by your frequent humility and honesty. I think those are such very admirable characteristics.
Jen says
Prayers for you dear Margaret and the precious baby. St. Nicholas and St. Andrew will be hearing quite a bit from me for this intention!
This was a beautiful post and I appreciate it. We all need the reminder that the “present” is always better to savor then trying to rush to the next “thing” on the list.
Angie says
I just a prayer for you, Margaret. I am with you — I am always on the go, and I keep thinking that I need to figure out a way for that to not always be like that. I just don’t know how. So, I totally understand. (((HUGS)))
Cindy says
Praying for you and that little one. Big hugs coming northward for you.
Kimberlee says
Praying! Uncertainty is so hard when we so desperately want to Know. Now. Hugs and more prayers.
KC says
Praying hard for you, Margaret.
Kristen Laurence says
You have my heartfelt prayers, Margaret. From one wanna-be-mom-again to another, I am with you, every day.
lapaz says
Margaret, you know you have my prayers. A decade already and four more before I go to sleep. Peace be with you, dear.
Patience says
Dear Margaret, hello from a “stranger” and sometimes caller to your lovely weblog. I got the prayer call for you and your baby from Alice. I know all about breathlessly waiting for those levels to rise, and so I’m sending you a prayer out of empathy and shared hoping. May your dream come true.
Ouiz says
I don’t comment often, but I read your blog daily… and I will be praying for you!!! May God bless you and your baby and keep you both in perfect health. May you carry this little one to term, and may this pregnancy be an easy one!
And thank you… thank you for your honesty in this post. I thought I was the only one who snuck in some email or blogging when I should be praying…
Nicole says
Thank you for sharing your reflection. I needed to hear it. We will also be praying for you and your family.
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The Bookworm says
Margaret dear … praying, praying, praying!
Donna says
Praying, praying, praying, Margaret.
Barb, sfo says
Adding my prayers to this group. May God bless you with the ability to slow down this Advent and may you be blessed in other ways as well. And I will pray for the intercession of the Holy Family for you and your precious little one.
Elizabeth says
Margaret,
you and your family have my prayers.
Let us know how things go with the HCG levels.
Tami says
Margaret, I enjoy your blog so. I am so impressed by your humility and openness. I am praying for you and your little one.
Jen says
Margaret, I’m late getting to this post, but know that my heart is with you right now..this very moment, and throughout this day. I beg God, will beg God, and hound Him to keep this child here, on this side of eternity. Congratulations, congratulations, congratulations, whatever the outcome may be. You are not alone in your struggle. I nodded my head when you told me you apologize to Him everyday for putting things first before Him. I said this very same thing to Him last night before bed. You have the gift of perserverance. It is a blessing. He is with you. All my love.
Jennifer says
Praying Margaret – I had a hunch.
guitarnan says
Margaret, I am joining my prayers to yours and everyone else’s. Thanks, too, for sharing your thoughts…I’m a go go go person, too, and it’s hard to pull up and take stock of where I am right now. Your thoughts help me gather my own.
Nina says
Praying with all the others. Praying that I too can truly listen this Advent.
JennGM says
Dear Margaret, I’m praying for you!
Paula in MN says
All of our prayers are with you. Please keep us posted. We’ll be coming down on Friday, if you want to meet for coffee!!
Cheryl says
Margaret, I will be praying for you and your family.
Fuzzy says
Margaret, I LOVE your blog so much! Yours is one that I check EVERY day, and you are a dear writer. I love your blog, and I would be just like that parent, blushing when I was found out.
You will be in my prayers at this time!
Anonymous says
I’m praying for you Margaret!
The Sojourner says
Praying.
(just one word…feels like I should say more…but what do you say?)
Laura The Crazy Mama says
I’m still praying for your “special intention”. I have hope. Numbers can be wrong, but if they’re not, I hope/know that God’s grace will see you through.
Kimberly says
Praying for you, Margaret…peace and blessings to you and your family!
MaryM says
Praying for you, Margaret.
molly d says
Margaret –
You can count on our prayers too for your most precious of intentions. We will also thank God with you for His goodness in giving you this most beautiful gift – entrusting another eternal soul to your care.
Love to you,
Molly & Co.
Janette Smith says
Praying mightily for you all, Margaret!!
stephanie says
I had a feeling that your novena intention had something to do with a baby…
I am praying for you and your little one!
Exspectantes says
So many prayers, Margaret!!
Maryan says
Prayers here, Margaret
Mary Ellen Barrett says
Memorares will be offered nearly continously for you and the wee one Margaret.
Jamie says
Skip a day and I miss everything!!!! I will offer my holy hour tonite for you and baby!!!! Many prayers and tears for you!!!
Lauri says
Many prayers going towards your intentions Margaret. I try to check in with your blog a few times a week. I love your writing & humor!
T with Honey says
I want to say more but words are failing me. Just know that my prayers are with you and your family.
Christine says
We’re praying here for you already – with tears in our eyes, and many more prayers to come.
Donna Marie from NJ says
{{{{{Margaret}}}}
You are in my constant thoughts and prayers! I have a very hectic week and weekend and as I plod through my time I will offer it all up for you. I will hold your intentions in my heart, dear lady!
Linda says
Margaret,
I am praying for you and your baby.
I read your blog everyday and I love it.
God Bless
Amy says
Praying for you and your family, Margaret!
Cmerie says
Margaret, I am praying for you and your new little one. God bless! (And also congrats!)
Spinneretta says
Margaret, my prayers are with you.
Beth says
Offering up the struggles of the day for you!
Sarah Jane says
What more can be said, except, that we know that God’s will for you is perfect and that He wants you for His very own. We pray that in this, your desires and His will be exactly the same.
I don’t know if I would have had the courage to post the e-mail from Adore te Devote; it took courage and humility. It was good food for thought.
Elizabeth says
Congratulations and prayers!
Meredith says
Praying hard for you Margaret!
Ana Braga-Henebry says
Praying an Ave Maria right now.
God’s will be done. His will is mysterious, but we can be certain that He never abandons us!
Cheryl M. says
Margaret, many, many prayers for your intentions! And Congratulations!!! 🙂
Heather in Washington says
Margaret, you and your family are in my prayers. May you have peace and understanding in your heart- may God’s will be done. And I don’t blame you for using humor in a bind- it’s what comes naturally to many of us. Hang in there!
Hélène says
Margaret, you and your precious baby are in my prayers.
Abigail says
Your little one is in my family’s prayers.
Ladybug Mommy Maria says
Keeping you in my prayers!
Lillian says
Please know that I’m praying for and your little one.
Suzanne Temple says
Margaret. I read this this morning and can finally come and a leave a comment. You are in our thoughts and prayers.
Annie says
I’m a daily reader of your blog and have come to rely on your witty insight to carry me through my day. Thank you for your blunt honesty that helps challenge the rest of us. I’m thrilled by your pregnancy announcement and am lifting you up in prayer that all will be well.
B-Mama says
Prayers Margaret! Just got around to reading your news– heartfelt congratulations! Thanks be to God for this precious soul who has now joined your family! (PS–our little ones are days apart! I’ll be 6 weeks Saturday, pregnant after a miscarriage in Sept. My novena is being offered now for BOTH precious lives.)
mel says
Very honest post. And lots of prayers for you and your newest little one.
Jennie C. says
So much loving here, Margaret. You are blessed!
Theresa ♥ says
Margaret, I was here earlier today and couldn’t find the post a comment button but I have been thinking of an praying for you.
Tracy says
Oh my, you have 69 comments before I even read this post! Congratulations and my prayers are with you!
Lina Martin says
congrats and many many prayers for your health and the new little one’s! 🙂
Dana says
I thanked an officer for pulling me over once. Maybe that was why I didn’t get ticketed but I really was incredibly grateful…I was falling asleep. And being pulled over gave me enough of an adrenaline rush that I was wide awake the rest of the short drive!
I am sorry to hear about the situation with the baby…I pray all is well. And the Lord be with you.
Dana
Principled Discovery
Anonymous says
A million prayers for you and your wee one! I too am in limbo- going tomorrow to listen for the heartbeat of my tiny one. I’ll be praying for you and hoping we both have extra cause to celebrate St. Nicholas Day! Love and prayers, Laura
lois in indy says
Am praying for you and the new little one with all my heart! God is good, please be at peace.
Ruth says
Dear Margaret. I will be offering up many Memorares throughout the day for you and your precious baby.
patjrsmom says
Margaret,
I will offer this morning’s rosary for your intention. Christ beside you no matter what!
God Bless,
Jane
Jane Ramsey says
Many prayers for you and the little one, Margaret.
Helene says
Prayers for you, dear margaret! And bless your dear new little one! Congratulations from the bottom of my heart!
Ruth says
Dear Margaret. I actually prayed the Saint Andrew novena last year for a baby and today we are so blessed to be holding our little Maria. I will offer up this Saint Andrew novena for your intentions. I am so thrilled for you.
Chari says
Praying for your intentions, Margaret!
From someone who got their first speeding ticket in 19 yrs…..four weeks ago :(…..a block from my house!